• Elder Rage, or Take My Father... Please!

  • How to Survive Caring for Aging Parents
  • By: Jacqueline Marcell
  • Narrated by: Jacqueline Marcell
  • Length: 12 hrs and 43 mins
  • 4.0 out of 5 stars (81 ratings)

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Elder Rage, or Take My Father... Please!  By  cover art

Elder Rage, or Take My Father... Please!

By: Jacqueline Marcell
Narrated by: Jacqueline Marcell
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Publisher's summary

Elder Rage is a Book-on-the-Month Club selection (a caregiving book first), receiving 500+ 5-Star Amazon Reviews, is required reading at numerous universities for courses in geriatric assessment and management, and considered for a film. It is a riveting, often LOL true story about Jacqueline Marcell's trials and tribulations managing the care of her challenging elderly father and sweet ailing mother. After fighting through the medical system and depleting her parents' life savings and much of her own, Marcell solved her eldercare nightmare medically, behaviorally, legally, financially, and emotionally-and shows you how you can too.

Elder Rage answers difficult questions such as how to get obstinate elders to: discuss long-term care options, accept cleaning and caregiving help, see different doctors, have medical tests, give up driving, attend adult day care, take medication, sleep, bathe and eat properly, move to a new residence, etc. - and teaches you how to manage stress, siblings, healthcare professionals, guilt, and grief.

Elder Rage has received 50+ prestigious endorsements including: Hugh Downs, Regis Philbin, Ed Asner, Jacqueline Bisset, John Bradshaw, Phyllis Diller, Duke University Center for Aging, Ken Dychtwald, Leeza Gibbons, Dr. John Gray, Mark Victor Hansen, Julie Harris, Institute for Successful Aging, Johns Hopkins Memory Clinic, Dr. Bernie Siegel, Dr. Nancy Snyderman, Dr. Rudy Tanzi/Harvard Medical School, and the National Adult Day Services Association who bestowed their Media Award on Jacqueline for bringing attention to the value of adult day care. Read Endorsements and Reviews here: www.ElderRage.com/Review.asp

©2001 Impressive Press (P)2012 Jacqueline Marcell

What listeners say about Elder Rage, or Take My Father... Please!

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Important, engrossing story

With a father’s life long struggle with childhood trauma and an adult electrocution, Jacqueline Marvell had her hands full when her father began having problems exacerbated by his caretaking of her mom. This isn’t just a story for those struggling with those issues. My dad was a dream, but I could still relate. She tells it well, with truth and compassion. It’s not just about aging and caretaking, it’s a human story with all the warts and blessings of humanity.

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  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
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    2 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

Timely compelling story, be ready for theatrics

Would you recommend this book to a friend? Why or why not?

Jacqueline Marcell has something for all of us who have elder caregiving roles. Her father's emotionally abusive behavior, which sounds incredibly bi-polar, really draws you in. She recounts the terrible time she had getting anyone to believe he could be so abusive and then extraordinary normal and charming (I think I yelled "flipcam! flipcam him!" at least a couple of times).
I know I would've enjoyed it more if Jacqueline had revealed her own self-discovery about a lifetime of enabling behavior, but it's hardly touched on. She gives a very theatrical read so take a listen to the sample first and see if you like it. The boomer pop culture references cascade non-stop and, as she says in the beginning, every incident gets it's own classic rock theme or motown theme song.

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4 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
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    1 out of 5 stars
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    3 out of 5 stars

Valuable story, poor delivery, offensive at times

This story needs to be told and there is really valuable information in this book and the authors experience. However the jokes and song references are mostly not funny and just make the story long and detract from it. And there is a lot of language that is anti-immigrant and anti-Black throughout that highlights the author has work to do around white privilege. As a person of color I am hesitant to refer this book to people because they will not get the benefits due to having to navigate oppressive language.

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Relatable, funny, and a nice resource

In the thick adventure of being the sole caregiver for both of my elderly and ailing parents, I found an unexpected kinship and much needed encouragement in Jacqueline Marcell’s book. My parents don’t suffer from dementia at this point, but I found many applicable resources/ideas, and connectible moments. I laughed at the stories that were much too similar to my own experience, and cried at the difficult parts of her journey. Until one walks through the "caregiver" door, it’s hard to understand the burden and weight of the responsibility, or the profound blessing and joy. I’m glad I “happened by” this book.

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Highly recommend

GREAT INFO & SO ENTERTAINING!
“Elder Rage” was so riveting I couldn’t wait for my daily commute to listen to Jacqueline! She has such a great sense of humor, even amid the most shocking circumstances she had to overcome. I gained so much important advice and creative strategies for helping easy and difficult loved ones. I was also fortunate to do a coaching session with Jacqueline and she was very helpful with ideas for my complex personal situation. I can’t thank her enough for sharing her amazing story and being so willing to help those of us starting our caregiving journey. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED!

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1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

The continued saying Jesus name from her father

I was looking for a cure not a story. Could not listen to the constant swearing

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Alzheimer's help...Here it is. Fun funny and true.

If you could sum up Elder Rage, or Take My Father... Please! in three words, what would they be?

Fun Helpful Real

What other book might you compare Elder Rage, or Take My Father... Please! to and why?

The Glass Castle, similar humor in the midst of a serious life challenge.

What does Jacqueline Marcell bring to the story that you wouldn’t experience if you just read the book?

I am thrilled that I got to hear it in her own voice. I'm sure that it added to her story because you can hear her re-living the events of her life with vivid emotion.

Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?

I laughed aloud many times, cried a few times, and have already told 7 people to get it. I've also already written to, and heard back from J. Marcell

Any additional comments?

This was a can't put it down. I finished in 2 days and on day 3, restarted with my husband. I think everyone should hear this story because Alzheimer's is growing at an alarming rate, meaning we will deal with it or know someone else who is.

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2 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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Incredible! Thank you so much!

I'm am so grateful I found your book. It's like someone through me a life line. I'm grateful for the practical solutions in dealing with a difficult parent at the last chapter. I purchased copies of your book for the indexes for my siblings and I.

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Fabulously done!

I thought I would check this book out because of issues the future could hold or even what I can maybe see in my own future. I expected more of a resource book, but it was so much more. It's truly one of my favorite "reads" ever. Jacqueline Marcell kept me totally enthralled along the way, with humor, wisdom, common fears, weeding through solutions and hard decisions.... and just kept me laughing out loud through most of it. Sometimes it's a laugh or cry situation, so you cry a little and then choose the laugh. Heartbreaking as it is in spots, it’s a wonderful, entertaining, and resourceful read/listen. I am particularly glad I purchased the audible version because Jacqueline's recitation makes it all worthwhile. I even loved her singing! (truly, Jacqueline, I did... I could relate to every single diddy.) I honestly think it should be made into a movie. Or a documentary. It would be a one-of-a-kind -- and so many people could relate to it and maybe find a sense of peace and not feeling so alone, I would imagine. I don't listen to books more than once as a general rule, but this is definitely in my repertoire of resources books as well as entertainment, and I have no doubt I'll be listening again and utilizing my bookmarks.
Thank you, Jacqueline, for the time you took to write and read your book for Audible and for showing your own vulnerabilities amongst your conquered moments. Truly a gem.

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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Must Read For Anyone Caring For An Aging Loved One

Aging is not a prospect many of us look forward to. When our beloved parents begin to decline in either their physical or mental health it reminds us of our own inevitable future. Unless a person is estranged from their family, chances are, they will play some role in the caring of one or both parents as their health becomes increasingly fragile. Personally my goal has always been to help my parents and in laws sail through their golden years with as much dignity and grace as possible. Unfortunately I never imagined how difficult that goal would be. I felt alone and isolated as I tried desperately to navigate the chaos that caring for my parents threw at me. Late one evening I stumbled across a review for Elder Rage. I almost passed on the book because rage had not been a concern. What a mistake that would have been! I nabbed the audio version and was surprised to discover the narrator was the author. Jacqueline's passion and humor shone through each spoken word. Her experience helped me gain insight on how to manage the care of my mother especially when medical personnel refused to acknowledge input from family members. It was comforting to know that I was not insane and other people had walked in my shoes. Jacqueline's experience as both someone who did hands on care-giving as well as long distance was very insightful. This book is a MUST READ for anyone whose parent's are entering the twilight of their lives.

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3 people found this helpful