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Seduce their queen.
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Sep 28, 2012 09:56
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It is actually really simple. Fortress wealth is absurdly high because of all the adamantine stuff you and previous overseers have been making. There are also "windows" for attacks, caravans, etc. You basically drove off one siege early enough to allow the caravan to spawn, but siege forces typically spawn a few days after caravans. It isn't so much that you are doing anything wrong Thadius, it is just that you got unlucky with timing.
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Sep 28, 2012 10:42
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I think we all know what must be done Step 1: Trade with the elves for whatever we need. Step 2: Once the elves pack up, allow them to leave. Step 3: Watch.
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Sep 28, 2012 12:25
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If you don't want to deal with a siege, then just cheese it and be done with it. Dig a tunnel, three squares wide, channel it so that it's only one square wide and surrounded by empty space. Channel beneath this for, oh, ten z-levels. Line the bridge with weapon traps and then open it up to the outside world. Then you can watch as a hundred goblins come rushing in and get chopped to pieces or dodge off the side to fall to their deaths. If you want to go further, fill the bottom level with cage traps so that you can torture them at your convenience. Or ignore them. Bronzestabbed Ignores at least has the virtue of being new.
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Sep 28, 2012 16:49
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TildeATH posted:Or ignore them. Bronzestabbed Ignores at least has the virtue of being new. The dwarf abides.
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Sep 28, 2012 16:59
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TildeATH posted:If you don't want to deal with a siege, then just cheese it and be done with it. Dig a tunnel, three squares wide, channel it so that it's only one square wide and surrounded by empty space. Channel beneath this for, oh, ten z-levels. Line the bridge with weapon traps and then open it up to the outside world. Then you can watch as a hundred goblins come rushing in and get chopped to pieces or dodge off the side to fall to their deaths. If you want to go further, fill the bottom level with cage traps so that you can torture them at your convenience. I like the sound of this one! I've already got a dwarf working on steel axes! Once my...thing is complete, I'll have the miner-dwarves take a look at making this. TildeATH posted:Or ignore them. Bronzestabbed Ignores at least has the virtue of being new. That was my plan, up until you showed me a better one.
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Sep 28, 2012 18:23
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Thadius posted:I like the sound of this one! I've already got a dwarf working on steel axes! Once my...thing is complete, I'll have the miner-dwarves take a look at making this. If you make it really long and very high, you can just use wooden weapons and watch enemies dodge themselves into terminal velocity. And if that makes you nervous, just fill out the final five squares with 25 spinning blades and 25 spiked balls.
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Sep 28, 2012 19:44
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Dr. Demon posted:I know it's a few days late, but I had a go at this because I like drawing monsters: This is really great! By the way it's the first art submission we've had in quite a while. I'm sad that we never got a full rendition of the pantheon. Journal entries have really dried up too. Is everyone busy with the new semester at school, or is there something we (thadius or myself) should be doing differently, to encourage participation?
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Sep 28, 2012 19:52
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Leperflesh posted:By the way it's the first art submission we've had in quite a while. I'm sad that we never got a full rendition of the pantheon. Journal entries have really dried up too. Is everyone busy with the new semester at school, or is there something we (thadius or myself) should be doing differently, to encourage participation? I've been meaning to write up some Journal Entries, but according to the spreadsheet I'm still an infant, so there's not much to write about right now. [Actually, Thadius could you post a screenshot of my dwarven self? Thank you kindly]
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Sep 28, 2012 21:08
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Frozen_flame posted:I've been meaning to write up some Journal Entries, but according to the spreadsheet I'm still an infant, so there's not much to write about right now.   Not a problem! You're still being carted around by your mother, who is even now gathering things for trade. While I'm here I think I'll take another look at the siege, maybe I missed that lashmaster showing up for round two. Could be a funny sto-     ...  Just foolin! But where did they all COME FROM?!
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Sep 28, 2012 21:37
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Thanks! Also that last line has now shunted "Land Down Under" into my head. gently caress.
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Sep 28, 2012 21:43
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Just been busy with work. I will get one today though.
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Sep 28, 2012 22:22
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Frozen_flame posted:Thanks! Also that last line has now shunted "Land Down Under" into my head. gently caress. That is totally appropriate, given that our savannah environment is very clearly Australian in flavor, what with the kangaroos and echidnas and so forth. Also it's a rockin' song. By a group called Men At Work, which is a lot like Dwarves At Work. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=McsWKczU6wc
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Sep 28, 2012 22:35
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OhCrap did a parody of that song during his term, even! It sums up the Overseership rather well.
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Sep 28, 2012 23:02
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Leperflesh posted:Journal entries have really dried up too. Is everyone busy with the new semester at school, or is there something we (thadius or myself) should be doing differently, to encourage participation? That said, going into any real level of detail about the fortresses workings will pad out updates to a ridiculous extent. Even so, very few dwarves get mentioned. Only five got named in the last update and six in the update before that. I guess what I am trying to say here is that we know how well the fortress is going, but we don't know how the dwarves are doing. It is no biggie, and I wouldn't have mentioned it if you hadn't asked.
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Sep 28, 2012 23:33
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If someone could be so kind as to provide me through private channels the exact materials list that my dwarf is currently assembling with, I have an idea...????
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Sep 28, 2012 23:36
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Kaishai posted:OhCrap did a parody of that song during his term, even! It sums up the Overseership rather well. That's because he is a Good Overseer.
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Sep 29, 2012 00:21
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Personally I haven't had much time to make terrible art since I've an alpha milestone for a game coming up, and I skip all the journal entries so I didn't even realize they were missing. *shrug*
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Sep 29, 2012 00:24
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There is a monster at the bottom of this update. 15th-24th Felsite Thadius sat at a desk. It wasn't his desk, he was only borrowing it for the moment. "Right, first order of business...dining room. Needs more tables and chairs."  "Couldn't hurt to have a few more nice statues in there as well."  "Hopefully Kaishai won't mind. She is the manager. Second order..."  "Toddlers seen going for equipment. Will have to keep a sharp eye on that one. Third order..."  "Aldantefax hasn't budged. He wants bones, rough gems, and rock. Maybe specific ones? Ever since we sealed ourselves in, bones haven't been as easily accessible. Will tell minerdwarves to go for gems, hopefully will solve issue. Fourth order..."  "The local weather has taken a turn for goblin."  "Also, we know a few more facts about bugbat training. Wait, what's in that cage?"  "...Well. At least that's ONE leader out of it."  "Wait, where is this unrelated report taking place?"  "Oh, on a set of stairs that I wanted worked on. Why all the stairs into the caverns anyways?"  "Where did that HAPPare you serious."  "They're actually coming in front of the tower? KERR! GET IN THERE!"  "GNU! GET ON THE WALL! Time to teach these goblins a lesson."  "Strike that. They're armed with bows. EVERYONE INSIDE, STRICTER LOCKDOWN WILL NOW BE ENGAGED!"  "I AM NOT KIDDING AROUND SILENT M AND TEDDLES GET YOUR BEHINDS IN HERE NOW!"  "I'm going to observe what these guys do now." Mostly, the goblins contented themselves with shooting up the elven merchants and their steeds, and then...  Just walked to the horizon. The elves were notably miffed, as Brannock told Thad. "They seem surprised that we would sacrifice their well-being for our safety." "Right, back to regular lockdown. Gnu, get on the wall, Kerr, get in the tower."  Eventually, the band of dwarves pushed the lasher- and sword-goblins to the point of fleeing, even if some couldn't aim. There was now a more complicated problem. Aldantefax hadn't moved from his station. The miners had dug out a few sections of gems, so it wasn't that. There was plenty of stone around, so that wasn't it either. He wanted bones.  Thadius stood by the lever...wondering...
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Sep 29, 2012 01:54
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Thadius posted:There is a monster at the bottom of this update. Oh dear. 
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Sep 29, 2012 02:14
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Leperflesh posted:This is really great! There hasn't been any narrative scaffolding to build journal entries off of. You got a ton entries from Ugathville because it hit a sweet spot. Journal entries have a problem in that they need to be substantive without running the potential of violating canon updates. There are a variety of ways of doing this (ongoing story arcs between dwarves, reactions to loss of beloved characters, or creation of a second class citizen) but nothing has presented itself that allows other to tack on their fanfiction. Just my two cents at least.
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Sep 29, 2012 02:30
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Thadius posted:He wanted bones. Well I mean, you *could* just butcher a livestock animal for bones, but this works too.
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Sep 29, 2012 02:34
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Awesome, I come back after working nights to find myself a master weapon smith forging axes! lovely MS Paint job Ahoy!   E: My Latin might not be perfect... Oski fucked around with this message at 03:47 on Sep 29, 2012 |
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Sep 29, 2012 02:47
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24th Felsite Year I have no idea So, another siege has come. What am I doing. Nothing. Frickin crossbow dwarves get all the fun and I am training. Just training.
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Sep 29, 2012 02:56
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Oski posted:E: My Latin might not be perfect... I think "Prima et Ultima Ratio Pumiliorum" is the correct syntax, but someone will probably correct me on that. And I think we all know what you meant anyway.
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Sep 29, 2012 03:25
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Cheers, it's been way too many years since I studied Latin. I may fix it some time if the mood takes me but it's probably not worth it. Can't wait to just become legendary, start with the blue stuff and then get eaten by a forgotten beast/have a magma forge explode/go insane/other. I wont last that long...
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Sep 29, 2012 03:53
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 28th Obsidian 241 I can't express the incandescence of magma or the hot burning smell of it, the molten metal tang always there, sweeter to me than wine even before that 'exploding wine murders dwarves' incident. I can't explain the hypnosis of liquid steel to anyone who doesn't understand. That's just as well because otherwise I would be as boring as a military dwarf who can't talk about anything but the heft of his crossbow. As yet I haven't hung goblin teeth from liquid steel and tried to get everyone of the opposite sex I see to touch it either, so I'm another point ahead there. But I've just about given up hope of making sense of anything here besides steel right now, because the Overseer--ex-Overseer--raved at us about gods and slavery and killing them all in the sky. I'm pretty sure I'm a slave to only one thing and that, like with any dwarf worth the name, is booze. I'm sure I could kill off a few barrels, and I'm just as sure there's no point in doing it from the top of a tower unless the idea is to vomit down on murk ogres. I would be willing to help with that plan. Is a giant phallic tower more hilarious if it spews vomit instead of lava or less? Next time I want to get my brain ensurgeoned I'll go ahead and ask him. 4th Granite 242 My birthday passed again! Also Loden Taylor is dead. In her honor I have written up an order for ten new drinking songs of tribute. They can probably not outdo 'What Will We Do With a Drunken Overseer' for popularity any time soon, but I can hope. 17th Felsite 242 So many sieges... so much iron... vivid adamantine... I haven't been away from the smelter in days. I feel a sense of achievement beyond all my dreams. The wafer I made yesterday shone; it menaced with brilliance; it was a wafer of legend. Not even carving images of myself on the walls ever brought me this much satisfaction. My engravings do actually look like dwarves these days and not bearded bags of flour, and the next time I carve murder holes they will be most elegantly murderous. Or I could engrave vomiting dwarf heads around them. Not so elegant, but the last thing every goblin saw would be a dwarf throwing bolts up into his face and what is elegance compared to that? Kaishai fucked around with this message at 04:48 on Sep 29, 2012 |
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Sep 29, 2012 04:26
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Kaishai is a little confused about dates (the dwarven month is uniformly 28 days long) but I always love those journal posts. Oski, although you used the Journal Entry banner, I'll treat your drawing as a drawing instead of a journal entry if that's alright.
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Sep 29, 2012 04:44
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Leperflesh posted:Kaishai is a little confused about dates (the dwarven month is uniformly 28 days long) but I always love those journal posts. Frick! I did not know that. Fixed, and thank you!
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Sep 29, 2012 04:50
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I have decided not to be a monster, and also, let you all in on my plan. A very motivational day. "It's done then, Nil?"  "Aye. Two sets of gauntlets and high boots each. A full suit of the stuff, and a few bits extra." "...Not quite what I intended, but good nonetheless. Come, walk back upstairs with me."  On the way up, Thad could swear he heard a dwarven coming-of-age party. "So what else is part of your plan? Don't think I didn't notice the miners working nearby."  "Well the first bit is to kill off one of our animals to provide bones for Aldantefax. He needs them. The rest you'll have to hear for yourself. We're going to the dining room."  The dwarves Tunicate, Tarox, Green Intern, Arrhythmia, KANE, and Pierzak were the only other dwarves in the room when Thad and Nil arrived. That'll change. "Proud dwarves of Bronzestabbed! Listen well to the words I bring to you!" The other six turned their heads, probably out of idle curiosity. "Even now the enemy bears down on our home. Even now the elves within our walls take bolts for us. Even now one of our own chants madly due to lack of resources. And I am not afraid." The dwarves were intrigued now, and a few more began to trickle in. "Why am I not afraid? Is it because I know something others do not? No, I know the same things as you do. I merely choose to believe in different ones. I believe in the strength of this fortress! Leperfish has shown me documents showing the age and the strength of this fortress, how it has repelled assault after assault, from all manner of beasts more ferocious and tenacious than these! Is it because of our location? Our resources? No, it is because of the strength of the citizens! Of the skill and wit of our militia!" Now the dwarves were starting to listen with rapt attention. The room was getting crowded. "But even the militia can be bested...UNLESS! Unless the fortress itself aids the militia! This is why I sought out the most talented armorsmith in the fortress, and tasked her with making armor worthy of legends!" Nil shuffled her feet a bit. "And she has done it! Completed a set of pure Adamantine armor! Soon enough, I will find a way to mine even MORE of the precious stone, and soon enough Oski will join her in the ranks of legends, and shall make wonderful weapons of the metal!" The dwarves were clearly invigorated, but Thad pushed on. "And now, I hear from the miners and mechanics that my project is soon to be completed!" This caught the dwarves off-guard. Project?  "Near the magma forges, where molten rock nearly meets the underground sea, I have had dug a vast chamber. It shall be two lengths deep at the end, and above..."  "...Above, I will have placed ways to control the flow of lava and water into this chamber. I will have created in massive quantities the dark glass of the earth: Obsidian! The only rock suitable for swords! The only rock that dwarves can MAKE happen! The best rock for our masons! I will have this dark stone made in massive quantities, and our fortress will prosper for eons to come! I give to you the Obsidian Generation Unit!" And as the dwarves cheered, Thad shared a grin with them. Of course, this will not be its only purpose...
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Sep 29, 2012 04:57
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Leperflesh posted:Kaishai is a little confused about dates (the dwarven month is uniformly 28 days long) but I always love those journal posts. No worries. I figured that because I got named in the updates I should make an entry and jet lag madness is more conducive to MS paint than quality creative writing so I just drew the (VERY concise) journal entry as engraved on the axe. I'll remove the banner if you'f prefer?
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Sep 29, 2012 05:48
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Gobsidian?
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Sep 29, 2012 06:00
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Good old Domas and Zefon. Loyal to the last 
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Sep 29, 2012 08:57
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Leperflesh posted:This is really great! I'll get a few journal entries done when I get closer to dwarfage. I'm a fair way off yet, if at all.
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Sep 29, 2012 08:58
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Oski posted:No worries. I figured that because I got named in the updates I should make an entry and jet lag madness is more conducive to MS paint than quality creative writing so I just drew the (VERY concise) journal entry as engraved on the axe. I'll remove the banner if you'f prefer? It's no skin off my nose either way, I was just making sure I was doing what you intended. Both types of posts (journals and posts containing artwork) will be archived (assuming my plans are realized) so there's no difference there.
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Sep 29, 2012 20:36
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Vox Nihili posted:Gobsidian? Think bigger... we're going to mine all of the adamantine 
king salmon fucked around with this message at 04:05 on Sep 30, 2012 |
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Sep 30, 2012 03:57
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Smug dwarves doing smug things. 25th Felsite to 25th Hematite. Aldantefax STILL wasn't moving. Nobody had moved to butcher the giant olm that was supposedly in storage. Two orders were issued: Any dwarf without a job was to butcher the Olm. When that failed...  More drastic steps were taken. Within moments of Thad issuing order number two  A dwarf named Apeynap took up this duty.  Apeynap took the Draltha...  ...went past the militia, who just added a swordmaster to their ranks...  ...past the fact that Oski had...  ...made a wonderful steel axe...  And slaughtered it.  From deep within the earth, a cry was heard. One of need and desperation. Of a dwarf finally getting what he wants. Everyone heard it, and it chilled them slightly. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONES!"  Within a short amount of time, Aldantefax was level with the path to the former Ugathville. And at this point, every other dwarf felt the need to try to outperform Aldantefax.  First, a dwarf named Frederico...  Made a masterful shirt. Though it did bring to Thad's attention that a previous overseer had ordered the loom to make shirts and nothing but. It was clogged with masterful shirts by a dwarf named Fritzy or some such.  More notices were tagged on so that no dwarf would end up wearing just a shirt.  Secondly, a dwarf named Vox Nihili...  Made a wonderful stack of bolts. When Thad tried to broach the subject that they would only be shot off and destroyed, he got a nasty look.  The elves politely informed Thad that they'd like to leave. Thad merely sighed as they seemed to not even recall the goblins shooting them.  Fitzy made even MORE masterful clothing, before Aldante had gotten to the stairs.  Aldante had nearly made it to the main staircase when a toddler grew up into a child. Another coming-of-age ceremony would be needed.  Oski was clearly in the groove, as he churned out another masterful axe.  As Thad went down to check on Oski and his project, the month, and with it, spring, ended.  Finally, Aldantefax made contact with the bones. On his way back, though, the interruptus newsus did not stop. Mostly because he was carrying a stack of 36 bones at once!  The queen decided that the export ban on ballista arrows had gone on long enough.  She still wanted some though.  Apparently a Drathala had gone missing at some point. Even though Thad was sure all of them were CAGED UP.  Juc made a masterful shirt. Thad couldn't see the point, he knew it would wear out eventually unless properly maintained, and none of the dwarves seemed to know how to do that. True, the better made ones would TAKE longer, but they WOULD wear out.  Vox made even MORE bronze bolts, and Oski...  Just...  Didn't...  Stop.  Neither did the militia in their training.  Thad met with the elves. "Do you know how bad an idea this is?"  "We have bowgoblins...  ...Speargoblins...  ...And ogres to the west.  And to the east, macegoblins. Plus I'm SURE that there's more that are just lying in wait. And you want to leave?" "Yes." Thad cradled his head in his hands. "Okay, look, I'm working on something that'll hopefully break this siege."  "Problem is, it'll take a WHILE to make. But if it works, we'll not have to deal with sieges for such a long time ever again. And it'll double as an escape route for you. Can you hold on until it's made?" "We'll try, but we make no promises." Thad went back down to watch Aldantefax, make sure he was alright.  On the way, he learned that The Archivist was good for something other than making murderholes. That work order would be filled in no time!  Also, some previous overseer left the mechanic's workshop with orders to make mechanisms non-stop and this resulted. This'd be excellent for Thad's plan. But finally...  Aldantefax...   Made it. And was off looking for gems. That was a nail-biter! But Aldantefax has his bones. All 36 of them. He moved so slow, I was worried he would snap before he got the bones back! That's the main reason this update covers such a long chunk of time: I was on Aldantewatch, making sure he didn't go bonkers. If I know my Dorfs, he ought to be fine now. Thadius fucked around with this message at 08:56 on Sep 30, 2012 |
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Sep 30, 2012 06:21
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Thadius posted:Apparently a Drathala had gone missing at some point. Even though Thad was sure all of them were CAGED UP. Edit - the insatiable grazing behaviour may have been corrected by Lepermod.
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Sep 30, 2012 07:27
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Never enough axes!! I will create a tidal wave of them to washchop away the siege...
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Sep 30, 2012 08:43
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Images and narrative was slightly out of order, fixed now. It's still the same update it just flows nicer now.Oski posted:Never enough axes!! I will create a tidal wave of them to washchop away the siege... I think I saw an image once of some dwarf using an axe as a surfboard on Bay12. Whether it was for lava or water, I don't know... (Thadius cancels task Remember Funny Image: Memory lost or degraded.) Thadius fucked around with this message at 09:01 on Sep 30, 2012 |
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Sep 30, 2012 08:58
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