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Murk the Screw! Wait, no. Offer the Golbins to the Mucky one! Whatever happened to my dwarf and his crazy bracelet?
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# ? Oct 8, 2012 05:18 |
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# ? Apr 28, 2024 10:10 |
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Sorry guys, there's a slight problem with the fort that I have to solve via complex means, which means no update tonight. I'll get one tomorrow though! ohgodwhyisnttheleverworking In the meantime, I want you all to think real hard about offering the goblins to the murk. That means somebody will have to place the cages in murkland and attach the mechanisms. All while under threat from the murk suddenly appearing. Anyone willing to offer their dwarves as a potential sacrifice?
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# ? Oct 8, 2012 05:51 |
TildeATH posted:You sure? I stabbed ogres in the eye a lot and their eyelids were constantly stopping adamantine swords. Obviously the skin isn't insurmountable, since I lopped off hands and feet, but it seems to go beyond just clothing. Oh, eyelids have always been loving strange, giant-size or no. I think it has to do with them being incredibly tiny and made completely from skin, but it's another mystery on the pile, I suppose. And yeah, I'm sure. I made a post about testing it. Take the giant's shirt/pants off and that sword chops right down to the bone.
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# ? Oct 8, 2012 08:34 |
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Thadius posted:
Not cages, silly. And certainly not mechanisms. You don't want them running around free, with or without murkage. You chain them in the murk land. Set a small cage stockpile that only accepts cages with goblins over there. Have it take from your regular cage stockpile. Meanwhile, build a couple chains. The chains should be at least 10 tiles away from the stockpile, and each other. That way the dwarfs won't be scared off by the first chained goblin when they go to chain the second. Dwarfs are only in danger for the moment it takes to build a chain, rather than the long time taken to hook up a mechanism. code:
I'd volunteer to do the chaining (my dwarf has experience with that sort of thing having previously jailed a murderer) but my dwarf is dead. Sorry.
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# ? Oct 8, 2012 08:36 |
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Clearly then what we need is an altar that can kill its victims. Something that looks like this: ^^^^^^^ ^S+++S^ ^+*0B+^ ^+*0B+^ ^+*0B+^ ^S+++S^ ^^^^^^^ ^ up ramp 0 wall/floor + wall grate * chain B raised bridge S statue It's a raised altar with obelisk/atom smasher. With the wall grates connected to mechanisms we could open and close it at will and allow observation without worrying about caravans attacking murk zombies. When we get new victims, we can atom smash the old ones and just replace the chains. The raised bridge doubles as a handy obelisk. It will be symmetrical in DF too. (You would build everything inside the up ramps on a block of walls, obviously. The 0s are the only spot where the floor shows through the superstructure.) Arglebargle III fucked around with this message at 10:05 on Oct 8, 2012 |
# ? Oct 8, 2012 10:01 |
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I have been a lucky dwarf. When that...thing decided to greet me in what was formerly known as Ugathville, I stopped what I was doing. I froze. I was a Bad Dwarf . I heard the bleats of the ram before, and knew I was in trouble. My Fight/Flight/Imbibe instinct kicked in and I ran into the nearest room, locking the room behind. The sounds that I heard. I shudder, reminded of the hacking, gnashing, spurts and gurgles that happened out the door. When the blood pooled from under the door, I took a peek out to see Mr Vile, grinning like a maniac as he stood over the mutilated corpse. I have been a very lucky dwarf. Now I must be a brave lucky dwarf. I know no sword, no axe, no hammer. My head knows of plants, my heart full of ale, my hands full of big honeycombs. My duty is to my child SilentDwarf, my husband Tyrant, Bronzestabbed, and The Rare Ship. Which is why I volunteer to lead the invaders, these wicked goblins to their doom in the murky ground clouds. I know now that danger already lurks in these halls firsthand, and we must use all necessary tools to protect our new home. For our spouses. For our children. For our booze stocks.
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# ? Oct 8, 2012 15:39 |
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HiHo ChiRho posted:For our spouses. For our children. For our booze stocks. Hell yes, I can't wait to see this unfold
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# ? Oct 8, 2012 15:51 |
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Murk them! For Science!
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# ? Oct 8, 2012 15:57 |
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Murk one and then put it in a thunderdome to fight the others.
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# ? Oct 8, 2012 19:42 |
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This update delayed by me obtaining FTL, trying it, and losing all track of time. The update has, however, been played. And screenshotted. And sadly, we will be experiencing MORE delays, due to an old type of friend coming around again. Update will come whenever I wake up. Because I am secretly a vampire, this will be some PM hour tomorrow. Bleigh!
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# ? Oct 9, 2012 09:28 |
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Murk the gobbos! If you haven't done something to them already.
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# ? Oct 9, 2012 15:54 |
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Bizarre minecart experiment for the gobbos!
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# ? Oct 9, 2012 18:38 |
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I think these are our things now. I wish they were different. 1st to 17th Moonstone Thad noticed that there was another colony of honey bees hanging around the fortress, so he asked for it to be transplanted. Why was it always HiHo ChiRo that did it? Was she trying to train up some war bees? Thad took another look at the screw and realized that the production had only been halfway completed. Some rollers, whatever they were, would be needed to finish it off on every level. Rollers required a bit of rope, though, and there was none to be had anymore. Work orders for the work orders god, I suppose. And then a mechanic came to Thad. "I've got some news for you, sir." "So you're saying that this floodgate will work. Once." "Aye sir." "And then we'll have an issue because the mechanisms..." "Already got some lava splashed on them sir. Another dose will see them done fer." Thad sighed. "So the chamber below, full of obsidian and water..." "'s all you're getting, sir." "Well that's good news, I suppose." Except that Vox had chained up lunnrais already and wandered off to get a drink before the other half of his job. This brought a foul joke back into the fortress. "Help! Help! I'm tied up and can't reach my beer!" And apparently, dwarves could see through solid stone walls. From the north, there was almost the cry of 'SNATCHER,' but... He'd gotten caught in one of Bronzestabbed's many cage traps along his way. Why do we even have those, all we catch is goblin. Vox lifted his hammer... And broke lunnrais' arm. "He was a marksdwarf, a hero! He shot goblins during the first siege! He NEEDED that arm!" Vox merely shrugged. "Hammerin' is a hammerin'." Which reminded Thad.. That the queen wanted her arrows. REALLY wanted her big, large, huge arrows. There was, however, a distraction on the horizon. "Why is that cow not in a cage? How is it standing upright?" "MINOTAAAAAAAAAAAAUR!" "Oh dear."
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# ? Oct 9, 2012 18:54 |
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Another Minotaur? I wonder if the incestuous clan is here once more.
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# ? Oct 9, 2012 19:00 |
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Thadius posted:Why was it always HiHo ChiRo that did it? Was she trying to train up some war bees? I think Thad has seen my engravings, but he has only scratched the surface of my future designs to protect our alcohol reserves .
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# ? Oct 9, 2012 20:30 |
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Protip: Only one dwarf should ever have bee keeping enabled. Otherwise two of them will go for the same hive at the same time and be stuck until one gives up because he's starving. Unless Toady fixed that bug. Either way, one beekeeper can easily manage 30 hives. Oh, and if you want your hammerer to stop maiming people, give him an adamantine hammer, AKA nerf bat. Due to the light weight it does barely any damage, but everyone is happy that justice has been done anyway. A hammering is a hammering. Just don't send your hammerer into battle with the nerf bat, that could go poorly.
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# ? Oct 9, 2012 23:47 |
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Angela Christine posted:Oh, and if you want your hammerer to stop maiming people, give him an adamantine hammer, AKA nerf bat. Due to the light weight it does barely any damage, but everyone is happy that justice has been done anyway. A hammering is a hammering. Just don't send your hammerer into battle with the nerf bat, that could go poorly.
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# ? Oct 10, 2012 01:42 |
Colon V posted:The blue stuff's exceedingly sharp, and makes very good armor, but is about as dense as styrofoam. Exactly !!
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# ? Oct 10, 2012 01:53 |
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Vaga42Bond posted:Another Minotaur? I wonder if the incestuous clan is here once more. I actually want to know! Where's OhCrap when you need her? (Besides as a pile of ash) I'll be too busy figuring out a way of killing it with minimal casualties to go looking up its history. Also: I'd do more work with the blue stuff, but its all our guys can do to process the stuff we have. Nil is doing her best to make quality armor for our melee squads. Then I might actually USE you guys besides Vile. Oh wait I forget that Vile is probably our best weapon in the fortress. This will hopefully be over soon. Coming soon to an LP near you: Day of the Minotaur! Minos: Horns of Fate Minozilla! I'll stop now
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# ? Oct 10, 2012 02:00 |
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Angela Christine posted:Protip: Only one dwarf should ever have bee keeping enabled. Otherwise two of them will go for the same hive at the same time and be stuck until one gives up because he's starving. Unless Toady fixed that bug. Either way, one beekeeper can easily manage 30 hives. Adamantine hammer!? How are our doctors going to get any training if we resort to that nonsense!? quote:Minos: Horns of Fate I actually like this one.
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# ? Oct 10, 2012 05:37 |
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Have an update without too many words. Pictures are worth more, after all. 18th Moonstone, 242. Day of the Minotaur. Starting to think that Mr Vile is a worse monster than anything else we'll ever find. But I'll never stop using him. He knows how to headshot, and he has a drat fine sword. Hopefully he can teach some of our guys similar behavior, so that you'll all be merciless killing machines. Thadius fucked around with this message at 05:54 on Oct 10, 2012 |
# ? Oct 10, 2012 05:46 |
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Oh, for .. Kothvir Stoodstrike the Target of Dusk - Hillbilly Minotarrrr Kothvir Stoodstrike was the daughter of Hok Splatteredhogs and Onam Knightechoed. In her spare time, Kothvir liked ambushing elves, elves, more elves, humans, elves, humans, elves, a dwarf, humans, elves, more elves, spam, another dwarf, humans, elves, humans, elves, more elves, humans, a bride of a starved horror, elves, humans, and elves. In 242, Kothvir was sent by Granny Minotarrrr to find 2 missing family members and a giant blind turkey "on account o'bein' tar-day." Relationships Kothvir mated with Cera Squashedred (father of Bulifo Perfectrun) to produce Ijat Mysterysucked, one of her many children. Ijat Mysterysucked mated with Hok Splatteredhogs- father of Kothvir - to produce Aru Strongscorched. Aru Strongscorched mated with Tomus Snotstrengths (father of Nguzo Fightwhips, the mate of Bulifo Perfectrun) to produce Xomlox Larvalshoves. Xomlox Larvalshoves mated with Equuyi Specialsweat (don't ask) to produce Uspsast Tempestaura. This is just the direct line. This poo poo is messed up. I don't even know how to describe her relationship to Bulifo and Uspsat. Grandma Aunty Sister Cousin in law? OhCrap fucked around with this message at 08:23 on Oct 10, 2012 |
# ? Oct 10, 2012 08:14 |
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OhCrap posted:Equuyi Specialsweat (don't ask)
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# ? Oct 10, 2012 14:01 |
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Colon V posted:I didn't know better, I'd swear that was a Homestuck joke. Not that I know of, but I'm not awfully familiar with it. Equuyi was the one that Loden Taylor and Pladdicus had encountered historically (Legends mode). She was Xomlox's aunt. She was also the daughter of Hok Splatteredhogs and Those Wandergleamed, making her Kothvir's sister. Her son Gerthu Twilightspurting went on to mate with Gosmsex Toothnights - another child of Kothvir. Gosmsex was the product of Kothvir and Tomus Snotstrengths. Tomus Snotstrengths also fathered Xomlox Larvalshoves (father of Uspsast) and Nguzo Fightwhips (both the nephew and mate of Bulifo). Back to Gosmsex. Gosmsex - Kothvir's son- mated with Gerthu Twilightspurting - daughter of Equuyi and Xomlox. Gosmsex also had kids with Aru Strongscorched, Kothvir's sister and granddaughter (and also Xomlox's mother with Tomus). At least two of these kids had their own kid that then went on to mate with yet another of Kothvir's kids. Oh yeah, and at some stage Xomlox and Kothvir mated. I was worried for a moment there that they'd missed a chance to make the gene pool even shallower. It is only a matter of time before a Minotarrr becomes its own father. Or mother. And sibling. Also: Now you have killed a minotarrr matriarch. Prepare for the wrath of Granny Minotarrr. OhCrap fucked around with this message at 16:48 on Oct 10, 2012 |
# ? Oct 10, 2012 16:13 |
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Can someone please make a graph of that? It is really kind of hard to tell what's going on. Is the graph fully occupied? VVV Nah. I actually meant the familiar relations. cant cook creole bream fucked around with this message at 17:09 on Oct 10, 2012 |
# ? Oct 10, 2012 16:47 |
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Air is lava! posted:Can someone please make a graph of that? It is really kind of hard to tell what's going on. The time I tried to make a chart with an online genealogy tool, I broke it. I break my brain every time I try to figure it out. The relationships are so interwoven that I find new things every time I look. I've already had to update the above post a couple of times. E: or you mean the last update? I had to play find the minotarr myself. She comes straight to the fort, over the bridge, and meets our champion very briefly while admiring the windmills. OhCrap fucked around with this message at 17:03 on Oct 10, 2012 |
# ? Oct 10, 2012 16:51 |
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OhCrap posted:Not that I know of, but I'm not awfully familiar with it. Anyways, looking forward to seeing Bronzestabbed kill this whole broken family. It'll be a mercy to them and the world alike.
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# ? Oct 10, 2012 19:29 |
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I have diagrammed the minotarrs:
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# ? Oct 10, 2012 20:15 |
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Colon V posted:To explain, there's an alien character who's sweaty and obsessed with muscles and horses. His name is Equius. I'm pretty sure that's a reference to some work of culture or other called Equus...
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# ? Oct 11, 2012 02:08 |
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Nine of Eight posted:I'm pretty sure that's a reference to some work of culture or other called Equus... More likely both come from the scientific genus of the horse, also Equus. At a guess, the genii and species for the Bronzestabbed minotaur must be Bos homo incestus.
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# ? Oct 11, 2012 02:27 |
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OhCrap posted:In her spare time, Kothvir liked ambushing elves, elves, more elves, humans, elves, humans, elves, a dwarf, humans, elves, more elves, spam, another dwarf, humans, elves, humans, elves, more elves, humans, a bride of a starved horror, elves, humans, and elves. I can find barely any fault in this kill list. Only two dwarves? Lots of elves? One crate of spam? No eggs oddly enough...
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# ? Oct 11, 2012 06:10 |
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Elf eggs are apparently not popular.
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# ? Oct 11, 2012 07:12 |
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Feinne posted:I have diagrammed the minotarrs: So here's the thing, Minotarrs aren't the kind of folks that traditional family trees work for. Instead, you have to treat a Minotarr family tree more like a social network, where being in one generation or related has little to do with your copulatory practices. Let us now examine the mating habits of Bos homo incestus majoris, The Common Dwarf Fortress Minotarr: Notice how Minotarr clan practices take no set pattern. Cera Squashedred and Emudi Gorysho are parents to a brood of four males that do not mate at all (or perhaps only recreationally). But one of their daughters provides them with mating stock both for Emudi and her other daughter Bulifo. Emudi is, then, mother to three boys and two girls, simultaneously grand and great-grandmother to a boy, and simultaneously mother and great-grandmother to two girls through her relationship with her virile grandson, Nguzo Fightwhips. Family is the tangled tapestry that Minotarrs weave.
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# ? Oct 11, 2012 07:42 |
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TildeATH posted:Instead, you have to treat a Minotarr family tree more like a social network, where being in one generation or related has little to do with your copulatory practices. Reserved for joke about clicking Like quote:Emudi Gorysho Your tool thingy trimmed it. Emudi Goryshoots, or Granny Minotarrr. Nice to see it in something comprehensible. I think the Turkeybeast is missing though.
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# ? Oct 11, 2012 07:58 |
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I liken Minotarrr family practices to making a flowchart: every year, they look for more lines to add. The rest of Moonstone With the Minotaur dead, work could resume on the fate of the goblins. "Close enough to the river for Murk to hit them, far enough away to not cause issues in day to day living in the fortress. All we need is a chain..." Thad placed a post-it slab down in the magma forges, asking for a chain. "That...is a rather large echidna. Hang on, is that...all the wildlife right now?" "No, wait, we have some bees." "Quite a few of them. Hi- actually that reminds me. I need to assign the wardogs." "One for Nil." "One for Oski." "And one for HiHo. Now I can send her for more bees." "Sankis, the issue isn't exporting, I'm not sending them away. I'm trying to get people to MAKE them in the first place, but they either do it when your mandate isn't active or not at all. I can't explain it." "SNATCHER!" "Quickly! Is the dwarf who discovered it female with a newborn?" "No..." "SEND THE MARKSDWARVES TO PUNCTURE IT MULTIPLE TIMES!" "Bugger, it got away. Ah well." "We have enough goblins to murk for a while." Thad sauntered over to the goblins. "Goblins, the dwarves of the fortress have decreed thusly: You are all to be murked, one by one. And once you are, you will serve as our zombie watchdogs, being replaced only upon your final death. All we are waiting for is a chain to tie you up with. Whatever you worship, make your final prayers. You'll be in no condition to do so later."
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# ? Oct 11, 2012 08:10 |
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Thadius posted:"...Whatever you worship, make your final prayers. You'll be in no condition to do so later." Should this plan work out, hopefully you will be remembered by this line.
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# ? Oct 11, 2012 13:51 |
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Where are those new migrants? I've gotta get in on this action.
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# ? Oct 11, 2012 14:26 |
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I was given puppies?
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# ? Oct 11, 2012 15:13 |
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HiHo ChiRho posted:I was given puppies? Angry flesh tearing, goblin slaying puppies. They'll go well with the bees.
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# ? Oct 11, 2012 18:57 |
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# ? Apr 28, 2024 10:10 |
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What is with this ballista arrow mandate 1. Are ballista arrowheads being forged at the smiths? 2. Are the finished ballista arrows then being assembled with wood + the arrowhead at the siege workshop via a seperate job order? 2'. Do the siege workshops have custom profiles that are restricting your siege engineers from using them? If all that checks out, I guess free a siege engineer from any other labors? ...check the burrow assignments?
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# ? Oct 12, 2012 01:43 |