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Oh hey speaking of the military...Internet Kraken posted:Yet he is somehow not the worst recruit, that award going to Olesh, possibly the most pathetic dwarf I have ever seen. He is fat, lazy, weak, and all around useless. The mere mention of strenuous labor causes him to complain endlessly and I often find him watching kittens play rather than training. Perhaps he will be useful as a distraction, as all that fat will no doubt take some time for a beast to chew through. At least Kraken's assessment of SirPenguin was about right.
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Aug 7, 2012 22:31
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FiddlersThree posted:Wouldn't it be a Pyre-ic Victory?  I suppose I should have spelled it that way.
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Aug 7, 2012 22:39
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 2nd Slate 239 No turkey should have three tails. No turkey should breathe fire. No turkey should kill fourteen dwarves in one black melee either, but it has happened. There will be no more soap for OhCrap unless someone thinks to tuck a few bars in her coffin. Nomikos will lie near her husband and son and father-by-marriage. Dwarves died in a haze of exploding, flaming wine, so there is less booze too than there was, and I cannot drink prickle berry wine right now. It smells like boiled fat and blood to me. If I were sure it smelled so to everyone I would set a few casks out as a trap for the zombie weasels. I make bad jokes because it is easier than knowing what to say. But it has died, the blind godly turkey, and of its corpse we should make a great feast in honor of the fallen and the fight they won. I will write a proposition to the Overseer: every year at Bronzestabbed there should be a turkey feast. (My own dear turkey eyes me with the gobble of one betrayed. I think I will keep him safe in my rooms for a week or two.) It will be a time to remember yesterday, and also to eat delicious roasts stuffed with plump helmets and valley herbs. It is important to remember. Leperfish and the others who speak of his view must be right. What else would bring a titan here? Malachite? Soap? The cat bone toy boat? Hell no. My birthday has passed again. Kovest Beriger Mebzuth Num was the worst belated present ever. I will be grateful next time someone gives me a figurine of a louse man instead. ...Well, no, I won't, but I will at least pretend. Kaishai fucked around with this message at 05:51 on Aug 14, 2012 |
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Aug 7, 2012 22:42
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Hey Rawkking can you use [timg] tags for your large images instead of linking them?
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Aug 7, 2012 22:42
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Can we make a soap coffin for OhCrap? 
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Aug 7, 2012 22:45
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Lets think positive, folks-think of all the thanksgiving leftovers we now have! :iamafag:
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Aug 7, 2012 22:48
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Brannock posted:Hey Rawkking can you use [timg] tags for your large images instead of linking them? Changed the thumbnails of those that were large enough to link to be regular images with [timg] tags and a separate link at the end. I think with how wide my monitor is a few may prefer the links. Rawkking fucked around with this message at 22:55 on Aug 7, 2012 |
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Aug 7, 2012 22:52
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SirPhoebos posted:Lets think positive, folks-think of all the thanksgiving leftovers we now have! :iamafag: AND now there's plenty of free bedrooms for the next wave of migrants! Speaking of which, is it me or it's been a while since there have been migrants?
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Aug 7, 2012 22:55
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YeOldeButchere posted:AND now there's plenty of free bedrooms for the next wave of migrants! I've only gotten through one month of play with the healthcare crisis and Kovest's arrival.  We should receive a spring migrant wave soon enough, I believe?
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Aug 7, 2012 23:01
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3rd Slate 239 Ugath has kept true to his word and claimed more. Leperfish is blind. But I saw the truth. I know it. Sankis has sent us here not to prosper or to survive. We are here to die. All of us and more to come are an offering to Ugath. Does Leperfish really believe we were to fight this evil? Here of all places. Sankis hopes that our blood will please Ugath so that they may survive. Not us. Not us. Not us. Not us. I know the truth. Soon Leperfish and the others will see the truth too. I will help. I came happily as a sacrifice. I will petition our leader to build a room of statues dedicated to Ugath so that we can all worship. I will sing praises to Ugath and lead more to follow after Him. I shall become His disciple to the people. Ugath will take our offerings gladly. 4th Slate 239 Petition to the Overseer: The Worshipers of Ugath require a worship hall that we may sing praises to Him in thanksgiving for all of His Greatness. Inside should consist of statues in His likeness and tables and chairs for us to sit and marvel in His Glory. Let all dwarves come to know Him. Shiv Katall fucked around with this message at 03:13 on Aug 13, 2012 |
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Aug 7, 2012 23:12
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Kaishai posted:Oh, no. Did anyone else have the Skyrim dragon attack music playing in their head while they read it? Dovahkiin, Dovahkiin, naal ok zin los vahriin, Wah dein vokul mahfaeraak ahst vaal!
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Aug 7, 2012 23:18
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Bad Munki posted:Can we make a soap coffin for OhCrap? Is this actually possible in the game? That would be perfect. [EDIT]If not, what about soapstone?
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Aug 7, 2012 23:19
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Zaodai posted:Is this actually possible in the game? That would be perfect. Only if it's used in a legendary item. I once had a bed of iron made this way.
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Aug 7, 2012 23:30
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Atomikus posted:Only if it's used in a legendary item. I once had a bed of iron made this way. I'm pretty sure soap isn't used as a material when creating artifacts. However, soap can be used as a construction material, so we could certainly build a soap mausoleum for OhCrap's coffin to rest in.
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Aug 7, 2012 23:37
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You can however build walls out of soap. The Mausoleum of Water-Necromancy. e:f,b
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Aug 7, 2012 23:38
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Bad Munki posted:Can we make a soap coffin for OhCrap? What are we going to put it in? I don't think she fared better than you  Zapdos already made OhCrap a tomb, so maybe she can get a soap statue or slab or something. Mayyybe.
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Aug 7, 2012 23:46
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OhCrap's tomb definitely needs a proper epitaph. Maybe something along the lines of "Hic iatus OhCrap, curator quondam, curator que futurus." And I'm seconding the soap statue of OhCrap.
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Aug 7, 2012 23:58
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This LP is wonderful  Just curious though, how come some of the text screenshots from the last update have missing characters? Seems like a couple of characters get chopped out at random intervals? [Edit] This one for example: 
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Aug 8, 2012 00:37
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Maugrim posted:This LP is wonderful Buggy truetype implementation.
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Aug 8, 2012 00:41
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Okay, I'm going to send out a test version of the game to anyone interested in about twelve hours (after some sleep). It's looking okay - major thanks to the two goons offering their voice talents so far, and thanks for the awesome music that's been done. Hoping I might be able to put it online soonish. canadwarf at cutgar.net if you fancy a peek at the test version tomorrow (my time) or want to scream into a microphone for me!
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Aug 8, 2012 00:45
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sebmojo posted:Did anyone else have the Skyrim dragon attack music playing in their head while they read it? That was one hell of a harrowing battle. Really well narrated, especially the heroic deaths. I've never seen Dwarves being burned to a crisp written so well.
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Aug 8, 2012 01:05
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The best part about eating the titan is that even before taking into account it being a titan, it's still a turkey, and thus the tastiest thing these dwarves are likely ever to eat. Shame we lost the only good Macedwarf I've ever seen, but she DID kill a titan.
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Aug 8, 2012 01:05
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What an amazing update. I don't know if you should be allowed to eat the remains, you should make them into legendary meals and buy out an entire caravan with them. Nakar posted:Somebody's going to be so embarrassed to find out "fat, lazy, weak" Olesh managed to shoot-dodge a Brush Titan and walk back in through the gates unscathed, blowing smoke from the tip of his crossbow. It's so great when something like this works out. It's a redemption scene straight out of a cheesy 80s movie. All you need is for Internet Kraken to start clapping slowly as Olesh walks into the fortress.
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Aug 8, 2012 01:11
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Wait, you mean I imagined the freeze frame as Olesh jumped, thrusting his fist in the air, while walking back into the fort with the sunset at his back? 
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Aug 8, 2012 01:13
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Bad Munki posted:Wait, you mean I imagined the freeze frame as Olesh jumped, thrusting his fist in the air, while walking back into the fort with the sunset at his back? Uh oh, that turkey is shootin' fireballs at us. Looks like we're gonna hafta jump!
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Aug 8, 2012 01:16
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TildeATH posted:I don't know if you should be allowed to eat the remains, you should make them into legendary meals and buy out an entire caravan with them. That's what its BONES are for.
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Aug 8, 2012 01:16
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Bad Munki posted:Wait, you mean I imagined the freeze frame as Olesh jumped, thrusting his fist in the air, while walking back into the fort with the sunset at his back? If it makes you feel any better, there's a reasonable chance Toady will sidetrack army development for six months to implement this.
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Aug 8, 2012 01:17
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TildeATH posted:If it makes you feel any better, there's a reasonable chance Toady will sidetrack army development for six months to implement this. I would be extremely okay with that.
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Aug 8, 2012 01:18
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Found near a pile of ashes presumed to be former overseer and militia captain OhCrap Mountainmist. All craftdwarfship is of the worst quality.The writing is impatient and poorly expressed. It menaces with spikes of ashes and blood, obscuring some of the text. It relates to the burning of the dwarf OhCrap Mountainmist by the Brush Titan Kovest Earthenrivers the Oars of Wind during the Assault of OHUGATHITBURNSARGH in Bronzestabbed in early Spring, 239. 13th Granite 239  Own Fine Turkey Dinner is too hot! And too big! And too alive! It is a Bad Big Dinner! It gobbles with spikes of Fire! 20th Granite 239 Psalmanazar  New Overseer has plan to do Fight Bad Big Dinner for sake of Last Hope. I Heed. I prepare to Do my Duty. I will do Dead Bad Big Dinner and then eat it. I am still Hungry. I want Own Fine Tail Roast for Birthday. I want to be a Good Dwarf. If I fail, I will be Own Fine Dwarf Roast. Beloved husband assures me this can not Happen now, because Zapdos does do Melancholy not Crankying Revenge. I do not nod. I do not Know. But this is my Task that Sankis set for me. This was in her ☼Briefing Notes☼. I will place myself before Threat to Last Hope. I will be a Good Meatshield. ‼21st‼Granite‼23‼‼ RedRansacker‼fought Bad B‼g Dinner‼He‼burns‼ Cousin‼SirPenguin‼fought Bad Bi‼ Dinner‼well‼He‼burns‼ I‼fought Bad Big Dinner‼I burn‼ Beloved‼husband‼fights‼Bad‼‼g‼‼inner‼He‼w‼ll‼burn‼ Al‼‼burn‼ ‼W‼llie To‼g to‼do‼de‼d‼B‼‼B‼d‼din‼r‼She ‼s‼b‼st‼Hope‼‼‼‼L‼st‼Hop‼‼ This ‼s W‼rst‼b‼thd‼y‼d‼ner‼ev‼r‼ Me ‼(Blood stains and ashes obscure the rest of this document, so if anything else was written, it is mercifully unknown) OhCrap fucked around with this message at 15:10 on Oct 5, 2012 |
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Aug 8, 2012 01:35
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I am...confused. A huge chunk of the militia got reduced to crispy snacks for some bloated gobbling beast. Now that doesn't surprise me, given that the militia her consisted mostly of a bunch of drunk idiots thrown into crappy armour and told to smack stuff til it feel over. I mean without my guidance that kind of loss is to be expected. I expected more from Bad Munki but in the end he was just another goddamn fool. But anyways, what confused me is that among the few survivors is...Olesh. The fat, useless loving kid that won't stop whining about every little thing somehow went toe to toe with that beast and came out alive. How is that possible? How did we lose our decent soldiers while the walking lard got out without so much as a scratch? I mean really what the hell? Maybe I was being to hard on- no, wait, gently caress that. He probably hid behind a rock and pissed himself while everyone else ran out and died. That makes a million times more sense. gently caress you Olesh! I'm going to beat that kid with my crutch as soon as I find him.
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Aug 8, 2012 01:37
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Internet Kraken posted:Maybe I was being to hard on- no, wait, gently caress that. He probably hid behind a rock and pissed himself while everyone else ran out and died. That makes a million times more sense. gently caress you Olesh! I'm going to beat that kid with my crutch as soon as I find him. This may not be far from the truth (Olesh got about 4 shots on the beast in the battle while the others generally got 10+ hits. Granted, some of that may just be him missing.)
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Aug 8, 2012 01:39
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Rawkking posted:This may not be far from the truth Oh that's right, zero.
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Aug 8, 2012 01:46
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Nakar posted:How many hits are the other soldiers going to get in subsequent battles? Don't make promises you can't keep. 
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Aug 8, 2012 01:54
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Veryslightlymad posted:Shame we lost the only good Macedwarf I've ever seen, but she DID kill a titan. Dwarf Willie Tomg was a serious bad rear end. Every battle I've thrown her in with the save, she's kicked rear end. That said, she was obviously every bit as flammable as she was talented..
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Aug 8, 2012 02:11
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Day outside, On Break under the corpsepicker's table Mass murder. Kilrudzat was seized by the hand of evil. It latched on firmly, but fourteen coffins of dwarf sent it flying off in an arc. The Bulbwork line will revere the burning touch of their son Tomg, whose bare fist marked the beast for death. Ugath appointed a champion and drafted him to his side that day. I saw the beast fall with my own eyes. I will record this for the sake of engraving. The world burns. Burned. The world around the front door. The grass and the trees and the corpses and the cloth, all consumed by fuel from the beast's furnace. Fuel. No lava is this hot. I saw the battle end because I left. From the door. I did not heed the Overseer, they shouted after me. I did not know which would be struck down in the struggle. I knew that if it would be Kilrudzat, it must be known for the sake of engraving and History. If the fortress falls, so do I. Burrowing inside would not be altering. This time, I took the bones of Ugath-taken and went to work on a Symbol. It will speak of this day more than my journal can. Not more than their sorrow can, but still. I have not been inside for over a week now. I stole away a ration of my last biscuits from when I worked the kitchens. The dew from the needlegrass is drink enough. Until the Symbol is done, I dare not face the chastisement for not heeding the mourning and the instruction. I also dare not interrupt the work when it is so easy. It is never so easy. Maybe the bones instruct.
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Aug 8, 2012 02:39
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I've just realized I'm going to laugh harder with each follow up overseer that isn't bad Munki. He's going to be handed a broken shell of a fortress with more ghosts than dwarfs and told to go hog wild. It'll be Hilarious then too!
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Aug 8, 2012 02:42
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I will take it in any condition.  and undoubtedly make it worse
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Aug 8, 2012 02:45
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Veryslightlymad posted:That's what its BONES are for.  Turkey bones. Titan bones. Your bones. My bones. Bone's bones. Bone bone bone.That really was an amazing fight. Let's just hope nothing else shows up before the next migrant wave that needs a functional militia.
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Aug 8, 2012 02:47
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You know, I guess every last dwarf in a squad getting killed works out well for Bronzestabbed in the end, since none of them are left alive to tantrum. Military tantrums never end well for a fort's civilians.
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Aug 8, 2012 03:24
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idonotlikepeas posted:Let's just hope nothing else shows up before the next migrant wave that needs a functional militia. Uh, yeah, sure, I'm sure that's what we all hope for...
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Aug 8, 2012 03:27
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