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Storgar
Oct 31, 2011


DISCLAIMER: Certain dwarfnames in this text have been changed by request.

STAR GUARDED MEMORIAL HOSPITAL PSYCH. WARD
Slate #7, Side B Date: 2nd Slate 241

Present:
QW: QWORD MOTHDASTRAKUST, Chief Medical Dwarf
TI: TIRIUS BASENMEDTOB, Medical Intern
ST: STORGER "THE DESTROYER" GESHUDARAK, Peasant

ST: Where's Markus?

QW: Markus went away. He's not your doctor anymore.

ST: I don't like you. You have a bad person nose! It's ugly and I don't like it. I want Markus!

QW: (ANNOYED) Can we proceed now? Armok! How long does it take to turn over your slate? Hasten yourself!

TI: ...my deepest apologies. I am caught up now, sir.

QW: I've been here for hours already. I don't have time for such trifles. If you don't speed up your note-taking pace to slightly faster than a plump helmet, I'll have you thrown in with the Ugathers.

TI: Yes, your Medicalness. I understand.

QW: Where were we... So, Storger. You seem to be turning into quite the troublemaker. I recall that we've set you up with numerous apprenticeships and hauling duties, but you've been "ejected" from every single one. Do you have head problems, child?

ST: I don't WANNA do any of those things. They suck! I had to make soap with Spikey last week, and then she made me use the soap to WASH the other dwarves.

QW: That's Mrs. Inetholtar to you. Consider it your personal duty. You should be enthusiastic having been asked to help the older, more useful dwarves than yourself. Especially those who are too old to take care of themselves.

ST: But... but...! Do you know how gross it is?? I had to wash overthefalls' BUTT and then when I was doing it, she fell over and died! That's dwarfin' gross! I'm not doing that again; you can't make me!

QW: Ok... fine. What about your lye-making job?

ST: I got kicked out after I splashed lye on someone's cat. She has no fur now.

QW: That stuff burns?

ST: Yeah, I didn't know either.

(ILLEGIBLE)

...

QW: GET OUT! YOU ARE A HORRIBLE MENACE!

END OF CONVERSATION

------------

DISCLAIMER: Certain dwarfnames in this text have been changed by request.

STAR GUARDED MEMORIAL HOSPITAL PSYCH. WARD
Slate #8, Side A Date: 4th Slate 241

Present:
CZ: MARKUS_CZ KILRUDOD, Chief Medical Dwarf
ST: STORGER "THE DESTROYER" GESHUDARAK, Peasant

ST: Markus! You're back!

(the Peasant grabs the Chief Medical Dwarf by the upper body with her left and right arms!)
(the Peasant latches on firmly!)

CZ: Ugh. I like you better when you were a crazy little brat.

ST: Are you staying this time? For real?

CZ: I had a bit of business to deal with, but now it looks like I'm here to stay. Unfortunately for you, looks like I'm not going anywhere soon.

ST: Don't worry, I've been er... a good girl. Heh.

CZ: Storger, I have the records. I know exactly what's been going on.

ST: Oh. Um, so are you gonna make me do more jobs now?

CZ: Well, no. I think we've learned these past few months that forcing you to do things can lead to some awful results. As long as you genuinely keep yourself open to trying new things, I'm sure you'll find your place in the fortress eventually. I'm a little tired, Storger. Let's keep this meeting short.

END OF CONVERSATION

-----------

Oh man, I hope I'm not taking too many liberties with this entry. My little girl is growing up! :qq:

Kaishai posted:

(Speaking of Medtob, last time I went to visit him he presented me with a blue peahen egg biscuit! It was charming. Or would have been if I hadn't pulled the biscuit open and found maggots. Either someone is trying to poison my pet or my pet is trying to poison me; Medtob knows I prefer emu biscuits though.)

:haw:

Storgar fucked around with this message at 03:52 on Sep 11, 2012

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Deep Dish Fuckfest
Sep 6, 2006

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Toilet Rascal

2nd Feltsite 241

Why is nothing getting done around here? I've ordered the gatehouse bridge torn down, a trench built there, and a better bridge built, but this is the state of things right now:



I've ordered this two months ago! For two months the fortress has been wide open and vulnerable to being plundered by kobolds, humans, goblins or even elves. That doesn't seem to make anyone hurry up, though. Why should they? There's plenty of soldiers ready to die to defend this place instead, so of course there's time for a break.

It's not limited to this project either. The trees that are choking the fort's tunnels still haven't been cut. There aren't that many, and we have woodcutters.

Just what is everyone doing?


3rd Felsite 241

Curse the gods.



We're out of barrels. And we're also nearly out of wood. To make matters worse, we're also low on charcoal, which we need for steel, and that'll also be a drain on our supply of wood.


8th Felsite 241

Hezelius had begun work on an artifact. I doubt I'll be impressed after that last bracelet, but we'll see.

In other news, I've closed the hospital in former Ugathville today. It makes little sense for two hospitals to exist in Bronzestabbed. It splits up our valuable doctors, and increases the risk of pointless death. From now on, everyone will be brought to Star Guarded Memorial.


12th Felsite 241

Hezelius is done.




He calls it "The Occult Influence". I'm... not quite sure what to make of it, truth be told.


13th Felsite 241

I've made up my mind.



Those two adamantine swords will be given to Mr. Vile and Mad Wack. Not the most inspiring names, but they are heroes, and more importantly, they come from outside this fortress. If the corruption I've seen here is limited to Bronzestabbed itself, then they can be trusted. And if that corruption is just dwarven nature, or pervades The Rare Ship, then does it really matter who I give those swords to?


16th Felsite 241

The elven caravan has been sighted approaching the fortress.



The elves generally don't bring much of use with them, but in this case we might end up low on a critical component for the "Screw" project, and they might be able to provide what we need.

Unfortunately, the current broker is still recovering from the injuries he sustained a few weeks back, so I've decided to appoint Brannock, a Trader by, uh, trade as temporary broker. He is one of the recent arrival, too. Call me paranoid, but being paranoid never hurt anyone, and when your own wife is part of a conspiracy, it's not being paranoid.


18th Felsite 241

Curse the gods! Diploid got sprayed by a skunk while hauling logs back to the fortress. Now the entire place stinks even more than it did before!

That's not the worst, though. Ikubi Akius, the mayor, just decided to ban exports of figurine.



Coincidentally, this occurred just after I ordered a bunch of bins full of crafts moved to the trade depot. Now we'll have to go through everything and make sure not a single figurine is traded, or some poor hauler will earn themselves a hammering. Again, not paranoid here, but, y'know, it kind of feels like some people are trying to hinder me.


19th Felsite 241

Curse every last god.



It could be worse.



I'd still prefer that we had a bridge we could raise at the gate, though. Hope those breaks you took were worth it, you assholes.

girl dick energy
Sep 30, 2009

You think you have the wherewithal to figure out my puzzle vagina?

YeOldeButchere posted:

Hope those breaks you took were worth it, you assholes.
The dwarves go mining eight by eight, hurrah, hurrah

TildeATH
Oct 21, 2010

by Lowtax
Two Goblin Elite Crossbowmen won't give a single gently caress together about your little blue swords.

I bet they're bringing more ogres. Just wait. These goblins loving love ogres.

Anchors
Nov 27, 2007
C'mooon, murkstorm. We need another zombie showdown.

Rawkking
Sep 4, 2011
Well at least we have *a* bridge to raise.

Leperflesh
May 17, 2007

Sorry guys, I've been busy all weekend so I just finally caught up with the thread.

YeOlde, you managed to skip Pengry on the dwarfing list, which would be OK except that TildeATH also skipped him, twice, so I went ahead and, uh, "highlighted" him on the dwarfing list.


Storgar posted:

Oh man, I hope I'm not taking too many liberties with this entry. My little girl is growing up! :qq:


:haw:


Well, bear in mind that journal entries aren't canon, so Overseers are free to ignore them: but I think if I were overseer I'd be likely to skip over your entry. Mostly because you're assigning to your own dwarf, actions which canonically were performed by another dwarf in the actual game (that is, someone else hauled that rock for sure): and you're also declaring it wasn't adamantine, whereas YeOlde is the only one who could know that if it were true (and it's probably actually adamantine).

When you write a journal entry that adds to the narrative, then an overseer can either incorporate it or ignore it, but it's unlikely he'll directly contradict it. When you write an entry that changes the narrative, you're treading on shaky ground.

Leaving that aside, drawing other named dwarves into a conspiracy that may or may not actually be in the game is also pushing the line.

So, I don't mean to pick on you, but it's been a long time since I last went over this so I thought I'd use your entry as an example. You are welcome to write whatever you want, and I will link all entries, but yours is assuredly non-canonical as it stands.

In other news: it is the year 241 now, do try to keep up people.

AfroSquirrel
Sep 3, 2011

Mandating the construction of ballista arrows? I think I could learn to like this queen... when I finally arrive at the fortress.

Storgar
Oct 31, 2011

Leperflesh posted:

Well, bear in mind that journal entries aren't canon, so Overseers are free to ignore them: but I think if I were overseer I'd be likely to skip over your entry. Mostly because you're assigning to your own dwarf, actions which canonically were performed by another dwarf in the actual game (that is, someone else hauled that rock for sure): and you're also declaring it wasn't adamantine, whereas YeOlde is the only one who could know that if it were true (and it's probably actually adamantine).

When you write a journal entry that adds to the narrative, then an overseer can either incorporate it or ignore it, but it's unlikely he'll directly contradict it. When you write an entry that changes the narrative, you're treading on shaky ground.

Leaving that aside, drawing other named dwarves into a conspiracy that may or may not actually be in the game is also pushing the line.

So, I don't mean to pick on you, but it's been a long time since I last went over this so I thought I'd use your entry as an example. You are welcome to write whatever you want, and I will link all entries, but yours is assuredly non-canonical as it stands.

Ah, okay. I can go back and change it if anyone requests it. I'll take note of this for any future things I might write.

Apparently, real-life Storgar is a troublemaker too! :argh:

EDIT: I took a second look at my journal entry and I've decided to change it because it is now very obvious to me that it is not in line with what a journal entry should be (especially what with being all obnoxious right at the top of the page like that). I like it better now, actually. It seems to focus more on Storger's coming of age.
My apologies, Mr. Overseer. I did not mean to disrespect. :tipshat:

Storgar fucked around with this message at 03:45 on Sep 11, 2012

Arglebargle III
Feb 21, 2006

You maniacs! You build a bridge without a trench! And also a ballista house without a moat! What the hell is wrong with you?! Do you want our siege operators to be slaughtered? Now the poor overseer who had to remove your sloppy work to get a proper drawbridge in place is going to take the blame for your blithering incompetence! :argh:

Aside: really what is the point of a bridge without a moat? Is it just a floodgate that won't jam?

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Leperflesh posted:

YeOlde, you managed to skip Pengry on the dwarfing list, which would be OK except that TildeATH also skipped him, twice, so I went ahead and, uh, "highlighted" him on the dwarfing list.

Well, the thing is, Pengry's dwarf name is "Steven", and we already have a Steven in the fortress. I figured it was the same guy.

Domattee
Mar 5, 2012

Arglebargle III posted:

Aside: really what is the point of a bridge without a moat? Is it just a floodgate that won't jam?

You can crush more people with it.

SirPhoebos
Dec 10, 2007

WELL THAT JUST HAPPENED!

Storgar posted:

Ah, okay. I can go back and change it if anyone requests it (or if it starts to stick out as exceedingly non-canon). I'll take note of this for any future things I might write.

Apparently, real-life Storgar is a troublemaker too! :argh:

For an example of how this can get incredibly out of hand, see the Overseership of Globofglob during the Syrupleaf LP.

Rawkking
Sep 4, 2011

Arglebargle III posted:

You maniacs! You build a bridge without a trench! And also a ballista house without a moat! What the hell is wrong with you?! Do you want our siege operators to be slaughtered? Now the poor overseer who had to remove your sloppy work to get a proper drawbridge in place is going to take the blame for your blithering incompetence! :argh:

Aside: really what is the point of a bridge without a moat? Is it just a floodgate that won't jam?

A raised bridge without a trench/moat is the exact same thing as a wall without a trench/moat. Building destroyers can't touch it, despite the fact that they can destroy a lowered bridge. Kind of lame honestly, but that's how dwarf fortress rolls.

Also I am the one responsible for nearly all the defenses we do have :colbert:

Rawkking fucked around with this message at 17:27 on Sep 10, 2012

TildeATH
Oct 21, 2010

by Lowtax

Rawkking posted:

A raised bridge without a trench/moat is the exact same thing as a wall without a trench/moat. Building destroyers can't touch it, despite the fact that they can destroy a lowered bridge.

Yeah, it's true, the ogres never actually could have smashed their way into Bronzestabbed during my turn. I just thought it was better to slaughter them than hide behind our indestructible bridge.

The towers, though, should have been designed for DF's horrible fortification code, which demands you build things that look like this:
XXX
X X
X X
X X
X X
X X
XXX

Because otherwise your idiot dwarves will stand a square away from the fortification and be unable to shoot. I meant to put a few of these out in the Fields of Vice, but spent all my manpower on mining Adamantine, digging out human style houses, and building an absurd monastery to the god of muck.

Rawkking
Sep 4, 2011
Ah geeze, go figure that dwarves are probably too dumb to move to the edge of fortifications to actually shoot.

Edit: Do ballista still need to be on the same Z-level of targets in order to hit? I wanted to be sane and put a ballista on the second level of the tower instead of its current awkward position but apparently that would be a largely useless position for a siege engine due to DF's wonderful physics :cripes:

Edit edit: Instead of making awkward towers if people are worried about dwarves shooting correctly it probably makes more sense to just put stairs on walls and fortifications at the edges of the tops of those walls. Kind of like real crenelated castle walls. Or do something like that for the top of a tower, :shrug:

Rawkking fucked around with this message at 17:42 on Sep 10, 2012

Leperflesh
May 17, 2007

YeOldeButchere posted:

Well, the thing is, Pengry's dwarf name is "Steven", and we already have a Steven in the fortress. I figured it was the same guy.

What, really?

In that case, it's likely Steven got dwarfed but the overseer responsible only missed posting the screenshots, because there's only one "steven" on the dwarfing list.

Poor Steven. So unimportant she's never even been noticed. :(

edit: Steven is a girldwarf, it turns out.

She has no friends or family and only a few passing acquaintances.


But she has killed a crundle, and I guess got wounded doing it.


And she has quite a lot of minor skills.



All of this is as of the last day of TildeATH's overseership, of course.

Leperflesh fucked around with this message at 18:58 on Sep 10, 2012

Rurik
Mar 5, 2010

Thief
Warrior
Gladiator
Grand Prince
I only glanced at the description, but what the heck are blood men?

TildeATH
Oct 21, 2010

by Lowtax

Rurik posted:

...what the heck are blood men?

Men made entirely of blood.

Obviously.

Brougal
Nov 5, 2011
I request to be an adult male dwarf and get a 8 year old girl who's parents may drop dead any day now. Oh well.

And they clearly don't understand anything about art and my love for it :emo:

Magil Zeal
Nov 24, 2008

Tias posted:

seriously, though - has anyone, anywhere, EVER, had a dwarf die of old age? I know I haven't, and I must have had near by a thousand fortresses now.

Back in 40d, I had a roughly 15-year old fortress wherein the King, Queen, and Adviser arrived, and I believe they all eventually died of old age. It was an interesting fortress all-around, right down to capturing a titan that the adviser worshiped in a cage trap and moving the cage to his room.

I must admit, though, I didn't expect to see that tag pop up in one of these succession fortresses! The dwarven mortality rate via non-natural causes is usually far too high to leave room for things like old age. Here's hoping for some more huge migrant waves to blast through the dwarf list!

Ramc
May 4, 2008

Bringing your thread to a screeching halt, guaranteed.

I didn't notice it on the splat that came up when my dorf migrated, is it possible to see what god(s) mine worships?

TildeATH
Oct 21, 2010

by Lowtax

Ramc posted:

I didn't notice it on the splat that came up when my dorf migrated, is it possible to see what god(s) mine worships?

The gods of opportunity and conspiracy, obviously.

There's been no update. We're all dead, aren't we?

Clocks
Oct 2, 2007



Can someone explain that artifact to me actually? Like, what.

Ready! Set! Blow!
Jun 17, 2005

Red alert.

Clocks posted:

Can someone explain that artifact to me actually? Like, what.

http://dwarffortresswiki.org/index.php/Planepacked

Known bug since... 40d, I think? Supposed to happen when a dwarf that happens to be assigned to a burrow/ordered indoors gets a mood and claims a workshop outside the burrow/fortress.

TildeATH
Oct 21, 2010

by Lowtax

Clocks posted:

Can someone explain that artifact to me actually? Like, what.

There's a bug in Dwarf Fortress that causes a mood dwarf to continue to collect materials for an artifact forever as long as they are constrained within a burrow that does not have access to the necessary stockpiles. Since the creation of the bits of an artifact is based on RNG, then it just continues to pile on historic events and other "interesting" bits and pieces as your dwarf continues to pick up pieces from the stockpile.

I didn't game this effect, it happened naturally because Improbable Lobster was part of Ugathville, and that burrow didn't have access to the stockpiles that contained the items he wanted. I made an allusion to it when Creepy Toddlerseer told Leperfish about it.

Of course, once it started, I wasn't going to let it stop and left it up to the next overseer.

GulMadred
Oct 20, 2005

I don't understand how you can be so mistaken.

Clocks posted:

Can someone explain that artifact to me actually? Like, what.
It was a consequence of the Ugath segregation. An Ugathite child (Improbable Lobster) was struck by a fey mood and seized a workshop in the fortress proper, but he was still confined to the Ugathite burrow. He wanted to make an artifact from a stone boulder, but whenever he grabbed a boulder and deposited it in the workshop it became invisible to him (since its physical location was outside his burrow). Then he thought "oh, I need to grab a boulder in order to make my artifact". Repeat ad nauseum, until the overseer rescinded the burrow segregation policy. He now had several dozen boulders stockpiled in the workshop, each one of which was destined to become a decoration or engraving on the artifact.

Since the construction of the artifact was a significant historical event which was ongoing while the materials were being gathered, some of the engravings on the artifact depict the creation of the artifact.

The final value of the artifact is a bit low because it used a lot of malachite (a relatively common ore); if you perform the same trick with cloth or gold then you can easily get an item worth millions of dwarfbucks.

Canny players sometimes take advantage of this bug in order to produce super-artifacts for prestige purposes (although the huge increase in fortress wealth also attracts sieges and attacks from legendary beasts). When it arises inadvertently, it often leads to death - the moody dwarf continues to collect materials until he dies of dehydration.

Clocks
Oct 2, 2007



quote:

all the responses

Huh, that's a really interesting bug. I can see why it happens, but the results are quite something!

TildeATH
Oct 21, 2010

by Lowtax

Clocks posted:

Huh, that's a really interesting bug. I can see why it happens, but the results are quite something!

Not that it matters because the whole fortress is currently making its way through a couple dozen ogre and goblin digestive tracts.

Pierzak
Oct 30, 2010
Back just in time to see myself finally dorfed! And what a great name, I think I'll be driven up the walls before long. If I do anything. Seriously, why do new migrants "not care about anything anymore"? Is the situation that bad?

Also, a gemcutter with poor kinesthetic sense :thumbsup:

Kinetica
Aug 16, 2011

Pierzak posted:

Back just in time to see myself finally dorfed! And what a great name, I think I'll be driven up the walls before long. If I do anything. Seriously, why do new migrants "not care about anything anymore"? Is the situation that bad?

Also, a gemcutter with poor kinesthetic sense :thumbsup:

He really didnt want those fingers anyways. (if they were even still attached with all of the invasions at this point)

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TildeATH posted:

Not that it matters because the whole fortress is currently making its way through a couple dozen ogre and goblin digestive tracts.

Goblins don't eat dwarves.

More importantly, Armok willing, things should be picking up from now on.

Pierzak
Oct 30, 2010

Kinetica posted:

He really didnt want those fingers anyways.
She. Apparently I got a woman. A transvestite female dwarf with a fake beard (unless female beards are legit in this setting, can't remember).

Leperflesh
May 17, 2007

No womanbeards in Bronzestabbed. Toady actually left a line in the code you can enable if you want them, but I didn't turn them on.

Antitonic
Sep 24, 2011

Invented By Gandhi
I guess it'd be more of a ceremonial thing with the false beard. Coming of age, elections, burial, that sort of thing.

StrangeAeon
Jul 11, 2011


:stare:

Good lord, this thread. And how often have DFLPs managed to get and keep a monarch alive? I remember a few of them going insane in the earlier LPs, when adamantine was the only requirement for the Mountainhome "upgrade."

...come to think of it, how and why do monarchs settle in forts? I've never yet managed to attract one.

scamtank
Feb 24, 2011

my desire to just be a FUCKING IDIOT all day long is rapidly overtaking my ability to FUNCTION

i suspect that means i'm MENTALLY ILL


StrangeAeon posted:

...come to think of it, how and why do monarchs settle in forts? I've never yet managed to attract one.

You either build up population, wealth and certain other requirements to climb up the title ladder until you can leap from dukedom to capital status, orrrrrr you just strike adamantine. It was reinstated recently, it seems.

TildeATH
Oct 21, 2010

by Lowtax

scamtank posted:

...orrrrrr you just strike adamantine. It was reinstated recently, it seems.

When did it get changed back? I never would have mined adamantine if I knew it would short-circuit our nobles. And I thought that meant the king showed up as a peasant (another thing I never understood).

scamtank
Feb 24, 2011

my desire to just be a FUCKING IDIOT all day long is rapidly overtaking my ability to FUNCTION

i suspect that means i'm MENTALLY ILL


TildeATH posted:

When did it get changed back? I never would have mined adamantine if I knew it would short-circuit our nobles. And I thought that meant the king showed up as a peasant (another thing I never understood).

I'm guessing 34.01. This post was back in April. No idea on the incognito bit, though.

Omnicarus posted:

I think my fortress is broken. The Queen just arrived as a peasant even though I only have 80 dwarves and no Mayor or Baron or anything of that nature. Also no roads or anything of real value. The only thing I can figure is that the one adamantine ore I mined to clear our space for a magma furnace triggered her to come.

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Felsite 19th 241

Alright, all civilians get the gently caress inside right now. Gnu Order and Walled Skies, on top of the tower. Melee squads, get in the gatehouse. Where the bridge should be, yes. Nope, don't know either, but you can ask the masons if you survive. And if not, haunt the poo poo out of them. You've got the overseer's permission.

Benagain is sent to the ballista battery.



Its position is "tactically dumb" as someone put it, but if Benagain doesn't run from the goblins, she might do some damage.

And since the goblins are coming from the northwest-



-and the northeast



they should have to go through its field of fi-

"Goblins from the east!"

What-



"And from the southeast!"

I-



"Ogres from the west!"

Ok, who's shouting all th-



"Ogres from the north!"

Yeah, ok, go gently caress yourself.





Alright, time for Plan B.

First step: every-loving-one gets inside.

Second step: raise the inside bridge for the gatehouse.

After that? You pray to whatever cruel god you believe in. If that fails, then we go to Plan C: we find the masons and kill them as slowly as possible, time and goblins permitting.

"But the elves are still outside in the trade depot!"

First, I told you to go gently caress yourself. Second, your point?

Any other questions? No? Let's do this.



If everyone's in, then pull the bridge lever.

Someone who's close by, preferably. Done? Good, now we wait and see how long it takes the goblins to break through and kill us all. Bets, anyone?


20th Felsite 241

Well, I lost that bet.

Still, it's nice to see we might live for a bit longer. The goblins have clearly made their way into the stronghold-to-be, and all we can hear are the sound of frightened animals trying to run away.



I've had someone get on top of the tower to take a look at what was happening. The elves have been laying volleys of arrows, which aren't doing all too much, especially with the goblin mace lord coming towards them.



Only reason they've survived so far is that he's busy with other things.




21st Felsite 241

Still alive, surprisingly. The goblins are slaughtering our livestock, and the sound of dying beasts is incessant. Through all this, the dwarves I've allowed on the tower for observation purposes (that means no shooting!) have reported spotting a goblin snatcher in the bone pile.



I suppose a siege is as nice a cover as they could hope for, but on the other hand the odds of getting a stray bolt to the face rises dramatically, so I'm not sure it's the best tactic. A for effort, though.

Also it turns out the volleys of arrow from yesterday are actually bolts from the goblin crossbowmen aiming for out livestock. Elves get F for effort.


22nd Felsite 241

The elves have taken refuge in the trench in front of the tower.



Amazingly enough, they're all unhurt.

Additionally, the goblins have invented a new sport which, as far as I can tell, involves hitting animals with blunt objects as far as possible.






I think the scoring is partly based on the sound the animal makes when hit.

I'm also hoping one goes for the more hardcore version of the sport.



You've got to catch it with your face to score. Try it, it's great fun!


23rd Felsite 241

The goblins have started to attack the elves. Or their horses at least.



I'm not a veterinarian, but I'm a surgeon and I can tell a fractured pancreas when I see one.

I won't lie here, I'm relieved to see the goblins are attacking the elves. For a moment I though the elves and goblins might have had a secret alliance against us.


24th Felsite 241

So yeah, the entire military is waiting at the entrance, but the goblins aren't trying to break down the bridge.



I'm gonna order the marksdwarves to get on the tower and try to kill a few goblins. Maybe that'll scare them off. The melee squads... I dont know, go back to training I guess? Keep your weapons close, though.


25th Felsite 241

Marksdwarves are on the tower.



Problem is, a good chunk of those dwarves have empty quivers. Don't ask me why, I've ordered bolts being produced non-stop for months now, and I'm sure we had some before. Maybe they got melted to make furniture for some previous overseer or some noble or I don't know! I'm sure it was a lot more important than our soldiers having ammunition, though.


27th Felsite 241

Not much progress in scaring the goblins away. Unfortunately, a roll call revealed that nobody had seen John Freeman for a week.



Hopefully he's not conspiring against us what am I saying? Hopefully he's not dead!


28th Felsite 241

I don't think much more will come out of this siege. The melee squads have stood down, and the ranged ones are on top of the tower taking shots at goblins with near-impunity. It's more like field training at this point. They've gotten a few decent shots here and there, but I don't think they've actually killed any of the goblins.

Lunnrais did pretty well, but no confirmed kill.


Oh well, I guess all we've got to do now is wait out the siege.


1st Hematite 241

So I've been told fairly often in my life that I don't get angry very easily. I can usually keep my cool, and I think you'll agree that I've handled things pretty well so far in this siege. That being said...



WHICH ONE OF YOU SUBNORMAL DUMB rear end poo poo FOR BRAINS MOTHERFUCKER DECIDED TO BUILD A HATCH FROM OUTSIDE THE FORTRESS THAT LEADS TO THE MAIN SHAFT? ONE THAT OGRES CAN JUST POP OPEN LIKE A GODSDAMN ROTTEN PLUMP HELMET AT THAT!

Militia?

GET THE gently caress IN THERE OR I'LL TREPANATE YOU ALL.



They've already taken control of the hatch to the lower lev- wait, what? How did those ogres open that hatch without smashing it open? Did somebody unlock it for them? But there's no goblins in Bronzestabbed, the only ones in the tunnels below are civilians like-



...

... my wife and daughter.

*twitch*

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