Art ‘n Shit

Your Chance to Be an Intelligent Designer

Bequeath unto us the next species of Darwin fish, and it could wind up inhabiting bumpers across the nation
by Anne Casselman
05 April 2007 Comments 54 Comments

Your Chance to Be an Intelligent Designer
Image: Anne Casselman
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Inspired by Matthew Bettelheim’s recent foray into the Darwin fish’s family tree here at Inkling we’ve decided it’s time for that family tree to get a little bigger and better. We’re having a competition to see who can come up with the next best Darwin fish design. So long as it cleverly incorporates that telltale fish profile, all ideas are game. Send us doodles, polished Illustrator files, graffiti art, whatever. We don’t care as long as it’s got an almond-shaped body, a tail and a certain wittiness.

E-mail submissions to by midnight April 16 PDT. Entries will be posted as they roll in. The winner will be announced to much fanfare on April 19, exactly 125 years after Charles Darwin died (or, if you prefer, met his Maker). The winning design will be considered by Ring of Fire Enterprises (makers of the Flying Spaghetti Monster decals) as their next emblem.

We are very proud to announce that the presiding judges will be Prophet Bobby Henderson of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, Nona Williams, co-owner of Ring of Fire Enterprises, and science blogging powerhouse PZ Myers.

NOTE: Ring of Fire will produce winning entry only with artist’s express permission and if they deem it has enough commercial potential (nudge nudge; so comment away and increase the odds of this contest resulting in a commercial product).

#1 SCIENTOLOGY FISH
Seeing as Anna and I just moved into an office space mere buildings away from Vancouver’s Scientology stronghold, we thought we’d get things started with this very facetious Scientology fish. See, its tail is the dianetics triangle. For those who aren’t up on their L. Ron Hubbard, the four green stripes recall the four divisions of a human’s urge to survive.

#2 PACIFIC NORTHWEST TREE OCTOPUS
Matthew Bettelheim submitted a different kind of creature of the sea. It’s the Pacific Northwest Tree Octopus. To learn more about this beautiful creature, read his article on it here.

#3 REALITY FISH
Thomas Farmer got so fed up with the Truth eating the Darwin Fish stickers he decided to retaliate.

#4 NO PHISHING FISH
Laura Preble’s fish stands against those evil people that phish email addresses from unsupecting web surfers. “As a neat little double entendre, those who
find the band Phish to be yesterday’s fishwrap can also use this pesky pescado to declare their disdain for all things retro,” she writes us.

#5 FISH MASSAGE
Dave Becker had a field day with the contest. Here’s the first of his five fish contestants.

#6 FISH OF JESUS FISH OF LATTER DAY FISH

#7 FISH OIL

#8 FISH POOP

#9 FISH TANK

#10 FRIENDS OF THE PACIFIC NW TREE OCTOPUS
Lyle Zapato gives us another design featuring his prankster creation, the Pacific Northwest Tree Octopus.

#11 HALF-ASSED FISH by Shane McKee

#12 ANOTHER POOPING FISH by Jerry D. Harris

#13 CECI N’EST PAS UN FISH by Devin Lee Drew

#14 DNA FISH by Christopher Hallquist

#15 TRILOBITE UN-FISH by Christopher Hallquist

#16 DIMETRODON FISH
Kimberly Riley sends us a drawing of her favorite ancient reptile the Dimetrodon. “Who better to hold up to the idea of evolution than something that walked around and ate whatever it wanted millions of years go?” she asks.

#17 DRAGON FISH by Kimberly Riley

#18 FISH SICK OF RELIGIOUS NONSENSE by DaveX

#19 ANOTHER CREATIONIST BASHING FISH by George

#20 CRYSTAL STRUCTURE FISH
Devin Lee Drew brings us another smarty pants fish. Crystal structure of the ribosome at 5.5 A resolution.  Crystal structure of yeast phenylalanine transfer RNA. I.

#21 WALLACE FISH by Chris Clarke

#22 TEAPOT FISH
Patrick Quigley sends in the Teapot Fish, in honor of the late Bertrand Russell and his famous Celestial Teapot metaphor.

#23 DARWIN FINCH FISH
“Often credited as inspiration for Darwin’s theory of evolution during his travels abroad, the speciation of Darwin’s finches collected from the Galapagos Islands by Darwin and H.M.S. Beagle Captain Robert Fitzroy wasn’t realized until specimens were processed upon Darwin’s return to England by ornithologist John Gould who realized they were all species of ground finches rather than various species of grosbeaks, finches and blackbirds Darwin assumed them to be,” writes in Darwin Finch Fish designer Jerry Roe.

#24 DARWIN METEOR
Also by Jerry Roe, this emblem, represents the theory that life arrived on earth by meteor.

#25 GOLD FISH by Matthew Bettelheim

#26 NO DELUSIONS FISH by Jeff Cooper

#27 GONE FISHIN by Pip Wilson

#28 BIG BROTHER FISH by Rob Beeston

#29 JUMP THE SHARK FISH by Rob Beeston

#30 KING TUT FISH by Rob Beeston

#31 SUN FISH by Rob Beeston

#32 SCHOOL FISH by Wilson Schersten, who wants to keep Darwin in schools.

#33 BABEL FISH by Megha Satyanarayana

#34 ADAPT FISH by Karmen from Chaotic Utopia

#35 SMELLS LIKE TUNA FISH by James Baugh

#36 DaTRUTH FISH by Fred Magyar

#37 TIKTAALIK FISH by Mike Hanson
“Tiktaalik roseae was an intermediate between lobe-finned fish and tetrapods that was predicted to exist before it was discovered. It has been compared to a Darwin fish.”

#38 DAWKINS FISH by Mike Hanson

#39 HUXLEY FISH by Mike Hanson
“Thomas Henry Huxley has been referred to as “Darwin’s bulldog” for his promotion of evolutionary theory and was the first to suggest birds may have evolved from dinosaurs,”

#40 DARWIN FISH SKETCHES by Matt Taylor

#41 LAMARCKIAN FISH by Shane Mckee

#42 UNCERTAINTY FISH by Rob Beeston

#43 WALL OF SEPARATION FISH by Rob Beeston

#44 BUG FISH by Rob Beeston

#45 ALIEN FISH by Rob Beeston

#46 JAH FISH by Randall Hicks

#47 MEME FISH by Peter Green

#48 ULTIMATE 747 by Patrick Quigley

#49 SQUID FISH by Patrick Quigley

#50 FACT FISH by Benjamin Shepard

#51 CONSCIOUS CARING EVOLVER
Geoff Hoare decided to design his fish to be a bit fuzzy: “This fish implies the coexistence of biological, social and personal evolution. It suggests naturalists can be wise and good without God, and that critical thinking and goodwill are equally important,” he writes in.

#52 PEE FISH by A. Brandt

#53 FISH VS SNAKE FISH by A. Brandt

#54 DEVOURING WINGNUT FISH by A. Brandt

#55 NULL FISH by Godfrey Temple

#56 ROCKET FISH
Matt Brown takes his fish further afield. “Only when we probe the oceans of Europa will we know what species diversification really means,” he writes us. “Hence, my contribution looks toward the stars.”

#57 WITCH FISH by Katherine Stock

#58 MITHRAS ZORASTER FISH by Nathan Stimmel.

#59 FREEDOM FISH and # 60 CENSORSHIP FISH both by Kimberly Riley.

#61 RELATIVITY FISH by L. & A. Alexander

#62 BUSH FISH by Mark Bettleheim

#63 ABDUCTED BY ALIENS FISH by Some Dood

#64 PARROT FISH the first of 11-year-old Raoul Huisden’s four fish, submitted by his mother Asha Brunings: “I’m sending you all of the them, but if you have to choose only one of them, my favorite is definitely the catfish. His cat is the love of his life, I should have guessed the catfish was going to come out

#65 FISHY SAPIENS

#66 EVOLVED FISH

#67 CAT FISH

#68 SCIENTOLOGY FISH submitted by Joshua Marker (though designed by someone else, who make their fish copyright free)

#69 INFIDEL FISH by Simon Bamber

#70 JUST THE FACTS FISH by Scott Maudlin

#71 DINNER FISH by Gordon

#72 CTHULHU FISH by John R.

#73 DAVINCI FISH by Luis Grave Rodrigues

#74 TOXIC FISH by Chris van Vliet

#75 GLOBAL TOAST FISH by Christopher Mims

#76 CHUCK D. FISH by Christopher Mims

#77 FINITE FISH by Dean Macaulay

#78 FISH FOOD by Godfrey Temple

#79 FISH IN THE DARK by Pekka Strandroth

#80 HEART WAVE MANDALA FISHIES by Peter Rosen

#81 RIBBON FISH by Tom E.

#82 TORPEDO FISH by William Donohue

#83 THUMBS UP FISH by Guido Jossels

#84 SKEPFISH by Pekka Strandroth

#85 MUTATE FISH by Lester Knox

#86 and #87 EVOLUTION FISHES both by Dean Macaulay

#88 CUTTLE FISH by William

#89 ANSWER TO EVERYTHING FISH by James Rice, who notes “If you’re looking for the answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything, this fish is the answer.”

#90 NEANDERTHAL FISH by Brendan Cahoon

#91 DANCING FISH by Teresa McGinley

#92 STINKY FISH by Mike Birch

#93 ASCENT OF FISH by Mathieu Frenette

#94 NATURAL SELECTION FISH by John Vreeland

#95 RELIGION VS. SCIENCE FISH by Ian Selkirk

#96 NO MORE MISTER NICE FISH by Hank Fox

#97 KISS MY EVOLVED ASS FISH by Hank Fox

#98 THINK FISH by Andy Wick

#99 THINK SOME MORE FISH by Andy Wick

#100 DNA FISH by Andy Wick

#101 CORRECT FISH by Adam Alexander

#102 NULL FISH by Patrick Quigley

#103 THE INVISIBLE AMPHIBIAN by Patrick Quigley

#104 DEMISE OF THE SPECIES by Michael DeHaan

#105 FISH IN A BOX by Mark Evans

#106 FISH OF PROOF by Laura Nuffer

#107 CRYPTIC FISH by Kelly Banco

#108 ROBOT FISH by Kelly Banco

#109 PARTY FISH by Alan Rice

#110 ToE FISH by A. C. Harper

#111 One Fish, Two Fish, Dead Fish, True Fish
It’s a play on the Dr. Seuss book “One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish” by William Logan & Robyn Schuler

#112 TRUTHINESS FISH
Gregory Tomko explains where his fish’s design came from: “I decided that a good successor to the Darwin fish would be the Jesus Fish, but instead of saying “JESUS” in the middle it says “Truthiness” I feel this word originally created by Stephen Colbert and now recognized by Merriam-Websters Dictionary suits the basis for believing in Creationism, or Intelligent design, as these ideas are only wished to be true, but not actually.  Real truth on Evolution can be backed up by more than one’s wishes, or one’s gut… it can be backed up with Fact.”

1. truthiness (noun)
1 : “truth that comes from the gut, not books” (Stephen Colbert, Comedy Central’s “The Colbert Report,” October 2005)
2 : “the quality of preferring concepts or facts one wishes to be true, rather than concepts or facts known to be true” (American Dialect Society, January 2006)

#113 HOOKED FISH by Dean Jordan

#114 DARWIN KICKS ASS by Robyn Goddard

#115 DAGON THE PHILISTINE FISH GOD
Dagon, the Philistine Fish God “Thats who the Philistines gave the arc of the covenant to after they stole it,” writes in Nick Polato.

#116 ANGRY AT PAMPHLETS FISH by Nate
This is to combat all those religions that persist on giving out pamphlets saying ‘Does Your life suck? Then Get Jesus to help’,” says Nate

#117 BURPING FISH by Ms Beep

#118 THE CRUCI-FISH by Michael Chamberlain

#119 STEVE FISH by Matthew Bettelheim
This one goes out to the 1% of scientists named “Steve.” The Steve Fish is inspired by the National Center for Science Education’s Project Steve, “a tongue-in-cheek parody of a long-standing creationist tradition of amassing lists of “scientists who doubt evolution” or “scientists who dissent from Darwinism.”

#120 COMMON GROUND FISH by Matt Landau

#121 SCIENCE FICTION FISH by Kevin Rose

#123 SCIENCE FISH by Josh S.

#124 DARWIN KICKS ASS by Robyn Goddard

#125 MAGIC FISH by George Wang

#126 FISH TACO (mmmmm) by George Wang

#127 COMMON SENSE GONE FISHIN’ by Frank

#128 DARWIN’S TIME FISH by Daniel S.

#129 EAT BEEF FISH by Sean Hunt

#130 FISH FOOD CHAIN by Bruce Harris

#131 LOOK FOR YOURSELF by Brendan Hussey

#132 SCIENCE FISH by Aaron Sakovich

#133 REASON FISH by Aaron Sakovich

#134 THE BREAKUP FISH by Tim McKenzie

#135-#139 CHERYL’S FISHby Cheryl Robbins

#140 SUPPOR THE TRUTH FISHby Jarrett Quon

#141 LOOKOUT FISHby Tony Alexander. This fish is keeping a lookout for fisherman, says Tony.

#142 THINK OUTSIDE THE TANK FISHby Adam Schneck

#143 DINOFISHUS by Jillian Hardee

#144-#149 MORE OF CHERYL ROBBINS’ FISH

#150 OPPOSABLE THUMBS by Amy Prostko

#151 MAGRITTE FISH by Courtney Lamb

#152 FAITH & REASON FISH by Daniel Eastwood

#153 FISH BRAINS by Dave Becker

#154 DEVOLVE FISH by Josh Mishell

#155 LOCH NESS FISH by Lindsay Tice

#156 PLUM PUDDING FISH by Lindsay Tice

#157 CANNIBAL FISH by Mark Anderson

#158 FISH EYE by Tiffany Young

#159 VISA FISH by Tiffany Young

COEXISTING FISH by Hope Asya Broughton

CRUCIFISH REDUX by Adam Alexander

SHAYNA’S FISH


EVOLVING IN ITS ENVIRONMENT FISH by Ingmar Rauschert

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