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Discovering Your Couple Sexual Style 1st Edition

4.4 out of 5 stars 24 ratings

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Winner of the 2009 Smart Marriages® Impact Award

Think all sex should be earth shattering? The quality of most couple sex doesn’t measure up to the much distorted image of the perfect romantic love/passionate sex encounter portrayed in popular culture. In Discovering Your Couple Sexual Style: Sharing Desire, Pleasure, and Satisfaction, renowned marital and sex therapist Barry McCarthy and his wife Emily McCarthy urge couples to ignore what they see on TV, in books, or online, and discover their own unique sexual style.

The McCarthys offer three guidelines for sexual satisfaction: develop positive, realistic sexual expectations; explore sensual and sexual options; and communicate sexual desires. With this foundation, couples can take a straightforward survey to determine which of four couple sexual styles best fits their relationship. Based on three years of research and treating more than 4,000 individuals and couples, Discovering Your Couple Sexual Style provides information, guidelines, exercises, and case studies that will help readers find their own sexual voice and develop a mutually satisfying sexual style.

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Editorial Reviews

Review

"This is no "cookie cutter" approach to relationships; McCarthy and McCarthy unearth unique qualities of each couple and show them how to blend intimacy and eroticism in a realistic and fulfilling style. Every couple can grow―and keep growing―with this book’s guidance." - Michael Metz, co-author of Men’s Sexual Health

"Once again the McCarthys have created a classic, easy to read, and relevant guide to a great sex life that is tailored to your personal style and taste. Great insights, compelling stories and fun exercises make this a must read book." - Dr Sue Johnson, author of Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love (www.holdmetight.net)

"With wisdom and clarity, the authors provide a wealth of solid information for couples who want to overcome personal challenges, bridge their erotic differences, and create a deeply rewarding and enduring sexual life together." - Wendy Maltz, author of The Sexual Healing Journey and Passionate Hearts

"The very concept of a "couple sexual style" is radically transformative and inspirational. It creates hope and confidence as couples realize that it's in their power to create and maintain, decorate and refurbish their own style―together." - Diane Sollee, Founder and Director of smartmarriages.com

"I appreciate that the authors note taht , while this is a self-help book, it is not a do-it-yourself help book. The book provides value to the sexuality field, particularly to therapy and counseling. It is a resource that is accessible to the average person by not bring over-priced or too daunting in size to read. It also normalizes areas of sexuality that are often viewed to be on the fringes by our society." - Shanna L. S. Klunk, LSW, MSW, licensed psychotherapist, in Contemporary Sexuality, june 2010. Vol 44. No. 6



"This is no "cookie cutter" approach to relationships; McCarthy and McCarthy unearth unique qualities of each couple and show them how to blend intimacy and eroticism in a realistic and fulfilling style. Every couple can grow―and keep growing―with this book’s guidance." - Michael Metz, co-author of Men’s Sexual Health

"Once again the McCarthys have created a classic, easy to read, and relevant guide to a great sex life that is tailored to your personal style and taste. Great insights, compelling stories and fun exercises make this a must read book." - Dr Sue Johnson, author of Hold me tight: Seven conversations for a lifetime of love (www.holdmetight.net)

"With wisdom and clarity, the authors provide a wealth of solid information for couples who want to overcome personal challenges, bridge their erotic differences, and create a deeply rewarding and enduring sexual life together." - Wendy Maltz, author of The Sexual Healing Journey and Passionate Hearts

"The very concept of a "couple sexual style" is radically transformative and inspirational. It creates hope and confidence as couples realize that it's in their power to create and maintain, decorate and refurbish their own style―together." - Diane Sollee, Founder and Director of smartmarriages.com

About the Author

Barry McCarthy, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist, professor of psychology, and certified sex and marital therapist. He has published extensively on couples and sexuality and given more than a hundred workshops around the world.

Emily McCarthy, having worked for years as a speech therapist, now collaborates with her husband on books that address issues faced by married couples.

Product details

  • ASIN ‏ : ‎ 0415994691
  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Routledge
  • Publication date ‏ : ‎ March 9, 2009
  • Edition ‏ : ‎ 1st
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • Print length ‏ : ‎ 146 pages
  • ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 9780415994699
  • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0415994699
  • Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 8.4 ounces
  • Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 5.98 x 0.33 x 9.02 inches
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.4 out of 5 stars 24 ratings

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4.4 out of 5 stars
24 global ratings

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Top reviews from the United States

  • Reviewed in the United States on April 18, 2016
    Good read...explains a lot
    One person found this helpful
    Report
  • Reviewed in the United States on December 27, 2012
    This book sparked a very lively debate/argument/air clearing between my husband and I. Its exactly what we needed to understand one anothers sexual style and the fact that the roles were actually reversed.
    A must read.
    6 people found this helpful
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  • Reviewed in the United States on August 17, 2010
    As a practicing Certified Sex Therapist, I am always on the lookout for a great book to underscore what I try to impart to my clients about healthy sexuality. This book captures the essence! McCarthy and McCarthy divide the book into helpful sections, discussing realistic, positive sexual expression and sexual style in Part I, techniques and attitudes that enhance sexual desire and satisafaction in Part II, ideas for dealing with specific sexual challenges such as sexual inhibitions and illnesses in Part III, and suggestions for maintaining healthy couple sexuality in Part IV. Particularly helpful to engage couples in discussion with one another are the self-tests and exercises which are beautifully integrated with the material throughout the book. While the book is focused primarily on the challenges faced by heterosexual couples, it contains great wisdom useful to all couples, especially those in a new relationship in which the development of healthy ideas and interactions can save heartache later. Many readers will appreciate the straightforward style and short length.

    Linda Weiner, LCSW
    AASECT Certified Diplomate in Sex Therapy
    Assistant Professor, Washington University Brown School of Social Work, St. Louis
    16 people found this helpful
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  • Reviewed in the United States on May 23, 2011
    I'd say this is a fun book to have in the earlier stages of a new relationship, but if you have been together for a while you will most likely know allot of these things already about the other person. The comparative quiz gave good insights and lead to good discussions on the topic.
    2 people found this helpful
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  • Reviewed in the United States on April 1, 2009
    I'm not an avid consumer of the sea of self-help books that wash ashore in bookstores constantly, but McCarthy and McCarthy provide an insightful, smart, well-written balance of insights and actionable ideas in a refreshingly readable style (with some interesting and enlightening anecdotes). Whether married, single, or just trying to understand how to frame feelings about what healthy sex is and the role it plays in satisfying relationships (as I am), this book is genuinely helpful and worth reading. No magical gimmicks, but solid, wise and useful counsel on a perenially tough topic from long-time, talented authors that genuinely seem to understand.
    35 people found this helpful
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  • Reviewed in the United States on September 30, 2014
    Informative and well written. The book arrived promptly and in great condition