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Cat Wings
Oct 12, 2012

Errr....where's the updates?

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HiHo ChiRho
Oct 23, 2010

I got murked, didn't I?

Rurik
Mar 5, 2010

Thief
Warrior
Gladiator
Grand Prince

Jewcoon posted:

Errr....where's the updates?

The elves stole them! :argh:

Leperflesh
May 17, 2007

LeJackal got back from holiday traveling late this past weekend, posted an update, and let me know there should be another one on Wednesday. So that's now overdue, and I'll follow up to see what's up.

Sorry for not being more on top of this. Between TG Secret Santa and some personal stuff I've been a bit occupied this week.

LeJackal
Apr 5, 2011

Leperflesh posted:

LeJackal got back from holiday traveling late this past weekend, posted an update, and let me know there should be another one on Wednesday. So that's now overdue, and I'll follow up to see what's up.

Sorry for not being more on top of this. Between TG Secret Santa and some personal stuff I've been a bit occupied this week.

This is my fault. I've been trying to elicit more journals and participation in the thread, like with my bolded names and call outs for stuff. I was holding off a bit to give more people time to get in entries and stuff, but I'm going to go ahead and get the update out tonight.

Crackmaster is the clear winner, and unless something crackerjack gets posted between now and the update Crackmaster will be awarded a lovely prize.

I would like to mention, as Leperfish reminded me to, that Dwarf Fortress killed my old harddrive. Luckily I had a backup file so we've only lost six days of Moonstone.

LeJackal fucked around with this message at 23:40 on Nov 29, 2012

SirPhoebos
Dec 10, 2007

WELL THAT JUST HAPPENED!

LeJackal posted:

This is my fault. I've been trying to elicit more journals and participation in the thread, like with my bolded names and call outs for stuff. I was holding off a bit to give more people time to get in entries and stuff, but I'm going to go ahead and get the update out tonight.

Crackmaster is the clear winner, and unless something crackerjack gets posted between now and the update Crackmaster will be awarded a lovely prize.

There would be more journal entries if anything interesting was happening. :human being:

FAKE EDIT: Seriously, this has probably been the most stable a succession Dwarf Fortress has ever been. And it's not necessarily your fault, LeJackal. The murk currently is (almost) a non-factor, None of current sieges have been threatening at all,, the Queen is satisfied with her accomodations, and we are swimming in resources.

LeJackal
Apr 5, 2011

SirPhoebos posted:

There would be more journal entries if anything interesting was happening. :human being:

Now that the Speedy Steve Memorial Track is operational, I look forward to the gripping narrative of our first minecart injury! Also I'm planning some dangerous magma construction!

Kaishai
Nov 3, 2010

Scoffing at modernity.
I blame NaNoWriMo. I want to do a journal entry sometime soon, but the creative parts of my brain have melted like unto excessive wax on a work order delivered to the manager at her magma furnace.

Leperflesh
May 17, 2007

LeJackal hasn't mentioned it, but Dwarf Fortress has claimed another computing device. There was the loss of a hard drive. It appears based on our latest chat that only six days of Moonstone were lost, due to fortuitous copying of saves between devices. Nonetheless, I'm satisfied that LeJackal has not yet violated the sacred pact of Overseerhood.

LeJackal
Apr 5, 2011


8th Opal

I stop by the Mason Sector of the Workshop Quadrant, ink still stained on my fingers. Clumsily I shuffle with the Work Orders before presenting the ones I would like carried out directly to the best masons in the fortress.

"Ah, yes, Simurgho, Otto Print, The Archivist, Tunicate, I have some orders for you."

I hand out the orders, one for each of them.

"Yes, yes, gods I need a drink you are reading those correctly. It is vital for fortress safety that you follow them to the letter.Safety. Pah. Yes the lack of quota is deliberate. Produce stone coffins and slabs until ordered otherwise.Where is Spork?"

I slap the nearest rough block of stone.

"Stop staring and get to work! Now!"

LeJackal
Apr 5, 2011
Let me put it this way. A lot, a lot of combat happened. Also some other things. I have 47 screenshots to write up about and I'm only halfway through the month. So I will post the first half of the month tomorrow morning and then carry on from there.

Arbiter Sands
Feb 14, 2011

LeJackal posted:

Yes the lack of quota is deliberate. Produce stone coffins and slabs until ordered otherwise.

"We're.. we're probably just going to bury the multitudes of our slain enemies, right? So they don't litter the place up? Right?"

Internet Kraken
Apr 24, 2010

slightly amused


The new overseer was trying to rile up everyone against what he believes to be the biggest threat to this fort. He wants us all to make a bunch of propagnada to make the other dwarves aware of this. So I've been going around nailing a description of what I'm sure is currently the Bronzestabbed's number one problem.



Oh, well what do you know, that isn't an elf. GEE I WONDER WHY THAT IS!

This crusade against the pointy ears might be the dumbest waste of time this fort has been forced to endure. We're supposed to be repelling evil itself and this idiot is getting everyone to mad at the tree huggers instead.

Shiv Katall
Feb 11, 2008
Rape knows no boundaries
It's mosquitos right? My dwarf hates them too. That is where the real war should be focused. drat the elves. Kill mosquitos.

LeJackal
Apr 5, 2011


3rd Opal



I am called to the old courtyard by the screams of terrified dwarves. An apparition has appeared, in the form of Steve. Though she was transformed into a terrible zombie and eventually slain, her spirit lives on. I admit that this pleases me somewhat - it demonstrates that though a dwarf may become a horrific monstrosity due to the Murk their spirit is untainted. The corpse of Dead-Steve was destroyed, of course, and so it cannot be interred. In its stead a memorial slab must be prepared, pursuant to Mortality Management Standards and Practices.



As Overseer, I will set a good example in this case for other dwarves to emulate.
I assign myself the task of engraving a slab for her. I will try not to mention how foolish wandering into the murk was in the first place.



5th Opal

While traveling through the Old Courtyard on my way to supervise the improvements to the Typhus Memorial Depot, I espy something deeply disturbing. The remains of young Typhus are still laying to rot in the sun and mud alongside dead animals and goblins! This is completely unacceptable.



Notwithstanding the strictly worded Fortress Hygiene Regulations which demand the rapid interment or destruction of all rotting corpses, this is also a grave insult! In accordance with the Military Honors Act and Fortress Cultural Conservation efforts, slain veterans are to be respectfully handled and interred in high quality coffins or well appointed tombs. Leaving a kinsdwarf and brave fortress defender to rot in the sun like an elf would is a grave mistake. It also shows weakness of our military to visiting traders or diplomats - I am glad the Old Courtyard is no longer a trade destination.

I write out two Work Orders, first for a coffin fit for a hero, and secondly for an expansion to the Typhus Memorial Depot to be used as a crypt and monument to our brave military.

7th Opal

Doctore Appel is busy on the other side of the river doing some hunting, working at killing a skunk. He is the first to spot the cloud of murk, much liek the one that claimed the lives of Steve and Typhus.



Fortunately Doctore Appel seems to be keeping his distance. It is only a small cloud. If he is cautious there should be no trouble.

8th Opal

I am updating the and expanding the mining efforts around the adamantine spire when word comes down from the surface. What began as a very small, stationary cloud of murk has ballooned to a zone of death larger than the Old Courtyard. It has nearly flooded the entire section of the north river bank with eldritch evil and has already swallowed the landscape entire. I climb up the Queen's Tower to get a better view of the massed murk.



This land is cursed, of that there is no doubt. From my vantage point, I can see that Segway Rave Has wandered directly into the cloud. It is hard to see, but the high vantage point and clarity of the gem and glass windows make it clear. We now have another zombie on our hands to deal with.




Doctore Appel reacts immediately to the now highly dangerous Dead-Segway Rave, taking potshots at the zombie with his crossbow. His hunting skills are for naught, though he strikes Dead-Segway many times, it hardly fazes the creature.

Combat posted:

The Cook is caught in a cloud of fiendish murk!
`Doctore Appel' Rakustnicat, Surgeon cancels Hunt: Interrupted by Dwarf Cook fiendish murk zombie.
The Dwarf Cook fiendish murk zombie is caught in a cloud of fiendish murk!
The Dwarf Cook fiendish murk zombie is caught in a cloud of fiendish murk!
The flying ðkangaroo bone boltð strikes The Dwarf Cook fiendish murk zombie in the upper body, tearing the muscle and fracturing the sternum through the (pig tail fiber cloak)!
The Dwarf Cook fiendish murk zombie is caught in a cloud of fiendish murk!
The flying ðkangaroo bone boltð strikes The Dwarf Cook fiendish murk zombie in the left lower leg, tearing the muscle through the (wolverine leather trousers)!
The flying ðkangaroo bone boltð strikes The Dwarf Cook fiendish murk zombie in the right upper leg, chipping the bone through the (pig tail fiber cloak)!
A tendon has been torn!
The flying ðkangaroo bone boltð strikes The Dwarf Cook fiendish murk zombie in the right upper leg, tearing the muscle through the (pig tail fiber cloak)!
The ðkangaroo bone boltð has lodged firmly in the wound!

Doctore Appel is in a precarious position, the river blocks his retreat south, and both murk and Dead-Segway lie between him and the bridge. His situation seems grim.



I shout at him from the tower to retreat, to dodge the murk and the dangerous zombie within. I am certain that a previous Overseer had written or documented a procedure for ordering a quick retreat. I rummage through my satchel as quickly as I can, praying that wind does not snatch the proper forms from my fingers. The pages are stained, sloppily written, but I follow along easily enough. There is no time for review.

I stand at the very edge of the tower's parapet and begin to hop up and down, every time shouting as loudly as I can.

"Heed!"

Perhaps it is my shouting, or perhaps Doctore Appel runs out of bolts, in either case he begins to run. He weaves through the Murk well enough at first, but the wind betrays him.




He was a gifted surgeon and a worthy citizen of this fortress. His loss is a tragedy, and now the numbers of murk zombies has risen to 2. Considering how easily Dead-Steve slaughtered a member of our military while mangled, I anticipate heavy losses. We cannot afford to lose another citizen to this murk, three zombies may overwhelm our forces. I am already pleased I constructed an emergency point of retreat near the forges. If I can rally the military and engage the zombies on our terms we may yet have a chance.



The murk cloud has crossed the river, and it is still very large. If it gets to the Old Courtyard, or into the fortress itself - disaster. I order everyone to withdraw immediately.

9th Opal



As quickly as the murk appeared, it vanishes completely. It simply dissolves away like Dwarven Sugar when it touches water, sinking into the ground or rising toward the Sun. I cannot say where it has gone to or why, but I am glad it it gone. Perhaps it cannot sustain itself long on this side of the river? I do not know. Dead-Doctore has not moved from his position on the other side of the river yet, and Dead-Segway seems to have vanished with the murk.

A child-like scream rises from the Old Courtyard, splitting the air like a ☼Steel Battleaxe☼. I tear my eyes from Dead-Doctore in time to see a mewling kitten slam into the surface seed storage at highly fatal velocity. From its mangled corpse, a stream of blood leads back to the point of launch like a red reed rope. Dead-Segway has managed to stealthily insert himself into the Courtyard!



The combat is coming from inside the fortress walls! I hurl myself down the stairwell, screaming all the way. Pull the levers! PULL ALL THE GODS BE CURSED LEVERS YOU FOOLS! In a flash, I recall the lessons of former Overseers. "HEED! HEED! PULL THE LEVERS!" Yes, those levers! ALL OF THEM.


Yes, these levers. The ones with the labels.

Miraculously, the levers are in fact pulled by the time I am halfway down the stairs. Panting, I throw myself onto the outside work ledge of the tower, peering down into the courtyard. I can hear the mechanisms of the various bridges groan as they turn with an agonizing slowness. Will they rise in time? Will Dead-Segway be trapped in the courtyard or the former depot cell? In either case, the military can be called, there may be casualties, but there could be hope. If Dead-Segway penetrates past the gates and into the fortress proper, however, I must order the retreat into the emergency cell. There is no way I would reach it in time, but I would die happy that this fortress and the Rare Ship survives.

Sweet gods. Rodyle is in the courtyard with Dead-Segway. If he becomes trapped inside the Old Courtyard with the monster, he will surely die, but perhaps in killing Rodyle Dead-Segway will be delayed long enough to become sealed inside. Would Rodyle's death be worth saving the fortress? Did this recent immigrant travel all this way only to find death where he though to see only hope?



Rodyle dodges Dead-Segway's attacks as best he can, and then smartly flees! If he can make it outside the Old Courtyard while leaving the monster inside that would be ideal, but even leading it fully outside our gates would allow time for the military to muster. Again, I leap into the air and call out from the top of my lungs as loud as I can manage.

"HEED!"

My shouting works even better than I thought. Rodyle sprints across the bridge just as it tears loose from the ground, scrambling over the rising edge. Dead-Segway is not so quick, and his rotten undead body flops into the mechanisms of the bridge as it doggedly tries to peruse and murder Rodyle. As it turns out, murk zombies cannot survive being shredded by the massive stone gears of a bridge.



What good fortune! The incident was not without casualty, however.

Bridgesquad: Mechanized Combat posted:

`Segway Rave' Atastolon, Dwarf Cook fiendish murk zombie has been crushed by a drawbridge.
The ({cave spider silk hood}) strikes The Soap Maker Spikey Inetholtar in the right upper leg, bruising the muscle through the ðrope reed fiber trousersð!
The ({cave crocodile scale trousers}) strikes The Soap Maker Spikey Inetholtar in the right foot, bruising the muscle through the (mountain goat leather sandal)!
The (+®-copper helm-¯+) strikes The Soap Maker Spikey Inetholtar in the left lower leg, fracturing the bone through the ðrope reed fiber trousersð!
The ({cave spider silk robe}) strikes The Soap Maker Spikey Inetholtar in the left lower leg, bruising the fat through the ðrope reed fiber trousersð!
The ðFinished Goods Bin (ashen)ð strikes The Soap Maker Spikey Inetholtar in the upper body, bruising the muscle and bruising the left lung through the x(giant toad leather cloak)x!
The Soap Maker Spikey Inetholtar slams into an obstacle!
A masterwork of `Vorpal Swordfish' Dastotadril has been lost!
x2
A masterwork of `Fitzy Fitz' Bardumiden has been lost!
A masterwork of `Krushdhead' Lilumiton Omristkatak has been lost!
A masterwork of `SilentDwarf' Tosidirid has been lost!
A masterwork of `Krushdhead' Lilumiton Omristkatak has been lost!

Considering what happened last time a zombie approached the fortress, we got off light. Total causalities caused by Dead-Segway: One adorable kitten.

LeJackal fucked around with this message at 17:33 on Dec 1, 2012

LeJackal
Apr 5, 2011


Opal 11th

We have barely recovered from the near-slaughter of the entire fortress at the hands of Dead-Segway when the other zombie, Dead-Doctore, begins to draw near. I see that he passes right through the river with no regards to swimming or drowning. The river is not a barrier for murk or the zombies it creates. Having only one bridge simply limits the options available for retreating. I will make a note of this.



Once again, I order everyone to get inside the fortress. This time I will not let the zombie escape my vision. I have the Station Order and the following Aggression Order already drafted. I will marshal all the military within the Old Courtyard and then open the gates, allowing the full military might of Bronzestabbed to fall on Dead-Doctore. I don't joke.



Everyone get inside, immediately! The zombie is drawing ever closer as you dally!



Against Orders, Tyskil and a wardog move to attack the zombie. I gave explicit directions for everyone to get inside the fortress and for the military to gather in the Old Courtyard. What is it about new members of the military and/or new migrants acting with absolute reckless abandon? The wardog, Stinthad, belong to Mr. Vile and is very fat and mostly just of one color.



That color is courage. With complete disregard for the danger, Stinthad bites and tears at the tough, undead flesh. As Tyskil ineffectually peppers Dead-Doctore with bolts, the wardog bravely tries to eat it from the feet up.



Surprisingly, Dead-Doctore wavers under this assault from dog and marksdwarf, retreating from the gate.



I wish I could say that the heroic or foolhardy bravery of one wardog could defeat or drive the beast off completely. Unfortunately this is not true, and Stinthad becomes an object lesson in the cruelty of these murk zombies. Bolt after bolt slams into the poor animal as he fights on until the strength leaves him. Unable to fight any longer, this brave animal collapses outside the gates. Should he die, I will have his bones made into bolts, that even in death he might protect the fortress he loves.




Stinthad bought valuable time for the military to gather and civilians to flee. I will station all squads in the courtyard, so that no one will face the beast one on one. Once they are assembled Dead-Doctore will be crushed beneath a full might of our militia!



Completely disregarding the orders to report to her squad, Tyskil engages the zombie all by her lonesome. No, do not engage the beast in single combat! Typhus was easily slain, and was more experienced! This could well lead to your doom! Join your squad. HEED!



Strangely enough, Dead-Doctore is shaken by the aggression and begins to flee from the gates he had been approaching. Heading back to the safety of murk territory, perhaps?



Tyskil is relentless! Her constant aggression may be the only thing keeping the zombie at bay. I am truly amazed to see such dedication to the fortress from one so freshly immigrated. If Tyskil survives, she should be held up as an example for the entire fortress to emulate. Really, I think it is no mean feat to have the steel to tackle a murk zombie. Considering her husband Rodyle just waltzed Dead-Segway to destruction via bridge, I shudder to think what their son, Enfield, might one day do.



While I admire Tyskil for being so courageous, I fear that she will soon be killed. She requires immediate backup from the rest of the militia. Enough of the military is assembled in the courtyard. I will send them out to aid Tyskil. Her bravery must be rewarded and supported. All squads, kill that zombie!



As the surge of armored dwarves rush out to do battle, I feel a tugging on my sleeve. In the midst of all this, T-Man is struck by a fey mood!



I have more important matters to attend to at this moment, but paperwork calls. One cannot allow for improper procedure, that is the wellspring of ruin. So I record the mood in my records and then immediately turn back to viewing the outer yard. In the time it took me to scribble a notice, the ponds have frozen solid. Everything is happening so quickly!

Also all the water turns to ice in an instant.



The zombie flees far, chased by Tyskil the whole time. The rest of the military is following behind, bringing what I hope is inevitable destruction for Dead-Doctore.



The entire military is on the move, heading for the zombie. Helical Nightmares hasn't even dropped the ☼Tunnel Tube Bed☼ she had been carrying! The dedication of our soldiers is truly something to behold! To think that elves would attempt to supplant themselves as heroes for our children when even a babe could recognize this nobility!



Members of the military finally close the distance and begin to strike at the zombie, relieving Tyskil of the sole burden to harry and destroy.



Rothon, munk, Mr. Vile, NineofEight, Dirty Frank, Magrov and NineofEight get right into it! Even though NineofEight is unwed, barren, and missing a foot, she still got into combat in time to contribute! These dwarves are just the tip of the spear, and soon the zombie is rolling in a sea of steel and strength. There is noplace for Dead-Doctore to turn without meeting a brave dwarf intent on destroying it. After being greatly bloodied, the zombie tries to retreat from the mob!




Dirty Frank is on him every step of the way, smashing Dead-Doctore's limbs into paste. On a living dwarf such injuries would slow him to a crawl, but zombies are apparently more resilient than that. The rest of the military follows behind, slamming and slimming chunks off the creature. In the fray, Mr. Vile unlocks a new, deeper martial understanding of his weapon and becomes a Swordmaster.

13th Opal



T-man has claimed a workshop, which I dutifully note. I will follow up on this matter later, I have more important tasks. Like watching the military cut off every avenue of escape that they might further pulp the zombie. There is no escape from their fury, and the dedication to my Aggression Order is pleasing.



The zombie is quickly mobbed no matter which direction he tries to run. There will be no slaughter of civilians here - eventually the weight off all those weapons will tear Dead-Doctore apart like the massive gears shredded Dead-Segway.



14th Opal

As the battle rolls into the fourth day, I find myself exhausted. How can the military keep this pace in combat without food or rest? I can barely lift my own quill when more news comes to me, blurted from an over-eager dwarf. A boy has been born! I am so excited I can scarcely contain my joy. Fortunately plenty of GETIN forms are pre-written, so adding the newly christened Darval to the fortress rolls takes little time away from the battle.





The battle is becoming dangerous in its length. For four days the full might of this fortress has fallen on Dead-Doctore and the beast still walks. What if it were five zombies, instead of one? Would our forces fight until they fell unconscious and leave the fort defenseless? I must find a way to address this issue, and soon.



At least this battle is good for training, as Pierzak has become a spearmaster! If only spears did anything against zombies. They seem relatively ineffective against them.

Finally, victory!


So many dwarves fought against Dead-Doctore, it is hard to name them all here, but see attached this reference list.


Of the three murk zombie dwarves that have been killed, two of them were defeated by Krushdhead. She is a terror with her axe. For Dead-Steve, decapitation, for this one she simply cut it in half. I will have to make notes on this. Already I feel that there may be a way to more effectively combat the undead menace. Perhaps I will give Krushdhead her own squad?


Yes, I will. Anyone who watched the battle knows that most tactics are ineffective. The fact that Mr. Vile's war dog, Stinthad, was the only casualty is the result of pure dumb luck. Therefore, effective immediately I will be forming a new anti-zombie militia squad led by Krushdhead, equipped with special weapons for the elimination of this menace. Let any dwarf that values this fortress above their own lives volunteer - I can promise for them glory and honor as stout defenders of this fortress and its citizens.

LeJackal fucked around with this message at 17:46 on Dec 1, 2012

LeJackal
Apr 5, 2011


Do you want to be more prominently featured in fortress chatter? (Updates)
Do you want to obtain through deeds incalculable amounts fame and glory?
Do you have a reckless disregard for personal safety?
Do you dream of doing the following at any idle drunken moment?


If you answered yes to most or even some of these questions, volunteer at your local Overseer to join the new militia squad of undead asskickers!

rzal
Nov 8, 2007

These hands were never meant for farming. rzal volunteers! Death itself couldn't stop these creatures, but the great hero Krushedhead is greater then death, and I will follow in her footsteps.

Anaxite
Jan 16, 2009

What? What'd you say? Stop channeling? I didn't he-
Ask not what Bronzestabbed can do for you; ask what you can do for Bronzestabbed. Which, in this case, is volunteer. Fatfingers volunteers to help repel the undead menace.

First Spear
Jun 27, 2008
Hooray, my dude fought.

Neddy Seagoon
Oct 12, 2012

"Hi Everybody!"





This is my first real attempt at painting/drawing anything in photoshop from scratch, and I think it turned out okay.

some old car parts
Aug 2, 2011

Makes me a very poor man
Wow I must say I'm very impressed with my zombie self for lasting that long.
My dwarf life wasn't long but ill be damned if wasn't eventful. Great job on the turn so far!

Mr. Vile
Nov 25, 2009

And, where there is treasure, there will be Air Pirates.


Opal 10th

I will diet the enormous war dog Stinthad. A war dog should crush bones between the teeth, not beneath the body.

Opal 11th

The war dog Stinthad defied the diet, attempted to eat murkish dwarf. I will investigate military applications of the war dog diet.

OhCrap
Oct 14, 2011

I MAKE VICTORY!

That's some stellar Heeding, right there.

Ghostly approval noises from you-know-who.

E: also, "the fiendish murk zombie cook is hunting!" is my new favourite.

OhCrap fucked around with this message at 16:51 on Dec 1, 2012

Vanant
Mar 27, 2010
Macha volunteers for the new undead-slaying squad, and hopes the new battleaxe is more effective than her mace.

Wubbles
Oct 30, 2011
Could you tell me what my guy, Wulles, has been up to lately?

LeJackal
Apr 5, 2011

Wubbles posted:

Could you tell me what my guy, Wulles, has been up to lately?



Lately your dwarf has been hauling tons of crap around. In the near future, though, I think he'll be making trade crafts of lead to unload on trade with the humans and elves. Little lead dwarf soldiers or something equally badass.

Or maybe I'll get some flasks made or furniture studded with lead.

Mortal Sword posted:

Hooray, my dude fought.

Did your dwarf grow up in a bad part of town? Guy goes right for the kidneys.



Liath Macha posted:

Macha volunteers for the new undead-slaying squad, and hopes the new battleaxe is more effective than her mace.

Please file a Form M1407 to request a transfer from your current squad, The Rainy Boots, and ensure that your commander, Mortal Sword approves your reassignment.

LeJackal fucked around with this message at 19:28 on Dec 1, 2012

Nine of Eight
Apr 28, 2011


LICK IT OFF, AND PUT IT BACK IN
Dinosaur Gum


Opal 11th

Dear Diary. Today I was attempting to read the "Reproductive Regulations" by a cave opening. They were very heavy. Especially addendum 120-CA-9 "On proper sporing ettiquette" which is 4 slabs alone. I couldn't make heads or tails of them so I took a look at an attractive new dwarf named Steve. He had smiled at me a few days ago, and I could feel a twinge in my beard whenever I looked upon him.

Steve became a bad steve. Guess I'll have to keep looking.
Also I really should consider dropping the regulations. The other day a toddler passed me in the halls while carrying an anvil for the new forges...

Leperflesh
May 17, 2007

I hate to break it to you, but Steve was a girl.

...not that there's anything wrong with that. But the sporing possibilities would have been... limited.

Wubbles
Oct 30, 2011
nine of eight could be gay check your privilege

edit: Oh, man.

LeJackal
Apr 5, 2011

Leperflesh posted:

I hate to break it to you, but Steve was a girl.

...not that there's anything wrong with that. But the sporing possibilities would have been... limited.

You have no idea how many times I have to double check things and change the gender pronouns in an update I'm already halfway through writing.

TildeATH
Oct 21, 2010

by Lowtax

Leperflesh posted:

I hate to break it to you, but Steve was a girl.

...not that there's anything wrong with that. But the sporing possibilities would have been... limited.

That doesn't worry me as much as this:

Nine of Eight posted:

I could feel a twinge in my beard whenever I looked upon him.

Either NoE lost more than her leg to that ogre, or she's talking about her "little beard" as the Dwarven Ladies like to refer to it.

Nine of Eight
Apr 28, 2011


LICK IT OFF, AND PUT IT BACK IN
Dinosaur Gum
Note to self; next time I make a journal be sure to check facts. In meantime give no fucks and roll with my heavily confused dwarf.

First Spear
Jun 27, 2008

LeJackal posted:

Did your dwarf grow up in a bad part of town? Guy goes right for the kidneys.


Haha, perfect, the old vet knows how to shank a motherfucker. Shame the murk zombie's kidneys were non-functional.

quote:

Please file a Form M1407 to request a transfer from your current squad, The Rainy Boots, and ensure that your commander, Mortal Sword approves your reassignment.

Don't think I was issued an official stamp, but I'll smear some murk zombie kidney juice of approval on the form.

Segway Rave
Dec 25, 2011

this is stanley barton he is the brother of the king and feels sad alot because other people don't like him much they say hes boring and not fun
Haha, I didn't even realise I had been dwarfed. Serves me right for skimming over the migration reports.

I managed to do something cool anyway. :toot:

GenericOverusedName
Nov 24, 2009

KUVA TEAM EPIC
Truly the most dwarven of deaths: mangled into various bits of machinery.

Sad King Billy
Jan 27, 2006

Thats three of ours innit...to one of yours. You know mate I really think we ought to even up the average!
I too volunteer for Zombie mashing duty.

Though maybe making traps maybe a more effective way to deal with them?

Leif.
Mar 27, 2005

Son of the Defender
Formerly Diplomaticus/SWATJester
Maybe I'm missing something...what's the Old Courtyard?

LeJackal
Apr 5, 2011

Diplomaticus posted:

Maybe I'm missing something...what's the Old Courtyard?

The Old Courtyard is where the farms and windmills were built, and also caravans passed through. It has since been supplanted by the Typhus Memorial Depot for caravan use.

LeJackal fucked around with this message at 21:44 on Dec 2, 2012

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LeJackal
Apr 5, 2011


15th Opal

Overseer Note on Opal Zombie Battle:
Causalities: 2 Animals
Injuries: Light.

Significant information has been obtained on the murk zombie menace and will be incorporated into the relevant fortress directives, see the appendix to this entry. (Fortress Directive 26)
As mentioned earlier, slabs must be engraved in order to keep the victims of the murk from becoming ghosts. I place the order personally, not entrusting it to a messenger.



T-Man has gathered all the materials he desires for his mysterious construction. I can hear his manic laughter all the way down in the forges. I can only hope that he produces something useful.




I head down to the forge area, not only to see what new artifact has blessed us, but also to draw out plans for a sterilizing entryway for the emergency capsule. By the time I arrive, T-Man has already completed his artifact. It isn't very impressive, but for it the fey have granted T-Man legendary skill in engraving.




With that matter resolved, I draft out the design for the sterilization chamber. A pathway next to the magma, able to seal at both ends will offer an alternate route to the emergency capsule. This will lure invaders or murk zombies into it - or misplaced dwarves. Two pump systems will drive either water or magma into the tunnel. If they are sick dwarves it will clean them, if enemies they will be drowned or burned. Then the system will open, disposing of the water or magma. It also would allow a safer way to airlock the emergency capsule. I draw out the designs in haste and then ascend back to my office.

An emergency capsule is a desperate tool, though. First we need a more functional military to ensure it remains a last resort. So I bring up both the military organization charts and the population rolls. It is written in the Military Directive that all regular squads have ten members, but I know that some of ours are lacking.

First up is Gnu Order, which has an opening for another dwarf.



Wales Grey is wasted as a trapper. He joins the Gnu Order to fill their ranks.



The Golden Barbs are terribly understaffed. The squad is practically anemic - no wonder it took four days to destroy one zombie.



I pore over the lists of our population, attempting to find some brave souls that could bring the Barbs back to full strength. I assign Debonaire Dwarf, Bettik, Steelion, Araganzar, Toiwat, and Promontory to new positions in the Golden Barbs. All new recruits are to be assigned battle axes, pursuant to Fortress Directive 26.



Like the Gnu Order, The Lovely Treaties need only one new member to round them out.



Nidhhogg, welcome to the squad. Please pick up your battleaxe at the depot on your way to see the commander.



As I am assigning Krushdhead her own squad, I first remove her from the Rainy Boots. Hardboiled can take her place.



That neatly plugs the hole in that squad.



An interruption to my military reorganization is actually good news, for once. Steve has at last been put to rest and no longer haunts the courtyard.



Finally she can have peace with her ancestors. On the way back to my office, I pass by the fort's legendary weaponsmith, Oski. I have been carrying the papers to formally certify him as Blademaker and award him some fine quarters for his work in giving the military needed tools to ensure the fortress' safety. I also press a Work order into his hand.

18th Opal
I call Krushdhead into my office for a meeting. I deliver the Military Hero Congratulations speech to her with the appropriate gravitas and offer her the freshly drafted Orders of Promotion. For the name of her new squad, I have chosen The Bronze Delights, in show of the hope I have that her efforts will bring hope and cheer to our citizens as they handily destroy any undead threat. In order to help make that a reality I have ordered the construction iof a new barracks for her squad, and sent an all call that she might have the bravest of dwarves willing to live and die for The Rare Ship.

Oh, and in addition to the barracks, the promotion, and the fame, I offer her one last thing. I unwrap the spider silk cloth covering the gift, allowing its divine blue glow to fill the room. Glorious adamantine, masterfully wrought by Oski into a graceful battle axe. As she lifts it, the blade sings as it cuts the very air, a warsong promising doom to the undead.

Krushdhead, congratulations on your new position as leader of the Bronze Delights!



I send Krushdhead out of my office just as a new messenger arrives. Apparently the various caged animals stored somewhere are becoming increasingly restless. Note to self: Call Animal Tamer



19th Opal

Production on the queen's new apartment furniture is going well. I order her furniture studded with other metal to increase its value and present a home worthy of her glory. I wish only that I had more electrum in the place of all the silver.



On my way upstairs, I stop by the hospital, and spy Rothon in the traction bench. Apparently the last skirmish with the undead was not as bloodless as I thought. As some point in the melee Dead-Doctore had scored a hit, but I had not seen it in the chaos of the mob. I stop and speak to Sir Ironhat to find out how our brave soldier is holding up.








We need strong arms to drive back goblin and zombie from our gates. I am pleased at least that our hospital system is running smoothly. Despite the loss of Doctore Appel we still have several gifted surgeons.

23 Opal

Too many dwarves are running around in threadbare clothing. We cannot be seen in tatters, it will display weakness to our foes. I place some heavy orders for replacement clothing.




24th Opal

Our Queen Sankis orders a mandate or ballista arrows. I immediately dispatch siege engineers to build some to her specifications.


25th Opal

A birth! Corbeau gives birth to a boy, casually spitting him out onto the rough stone floor of some cranny built into this madhouse of a fortress. By the time I arrive with the GETIN forms he's already been wrapped in swaddling cloth and named Oberndorf by his parents.



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