China Reports Dolphins Foiled Pirate Attack

INSERT DESCRIPTIONChina Radio International China Radio International reported that this group of dolphins blocked Somali pirates who were trying to attack Chinese merchant ships in the Gulf of Aden.

According to a report from China’s official news agency Xinhua, “thousands of dolphins” recently prevented an attack on Chinese merchant ships by Somali pirates in the Gulf of Aden. Xinhua’s Web site published the photograph above, and three others, which first appeared on the Web site of China Radio International on Monday.

It has to be said that none of the photographs actually shows the boats said to contain Somali pirates being blocked by the dolphins, but Xinhua reported news of the dolphin intervention as fact. Xinhua’s English-language report, about a group of merchant ships escorted through the dangerous waters by vessels from the Chinese navy, contains some translation errors, but describes the efforts of the newest members of the anti-piracy coalition in glowing, even poetic, detail:

The Chinese merchant ships escorted by a China’s fleet sailed on the Gulf of Aden when they met some suspected pirate ships. Thousands of dolphins suddenly leaped out of water between pirates and merchants when the pirate ships headed for the China’s.

The suspected pirates ships stopped and then turned away. The pirates could only lament their littleness befor the vast number of dolphins. The spectacular scene continued for a while.

Xinhua does not suggest that the cetacean force may have been part of a classified military program, but given that we know that the United States military has at least tried to train dolphins to work for the government, The Lede is not yet willing to rule out the possibility.

In 1989 Timothy Egan, who now blogs for The Times, reported in the newspaper that the United States Navy was working on a plan to use dolphins to guard a nuclear submarine base and had already spent millions of dollars on training, though there had been some problems:

As part of a top-secret program expanded in the Reagan administration, the Navy has spent nearly $30 million in the last four years trying to put the highly intelligent marine mammals to military use. […]

Critics question the ethics of using what is seen as a benign creature for military tasks and charge that dolphins, known to be independent and unpredictable, are not reliable guardians. […]

Navy officials admit that dolphins and sea lions, which are also being trained for military use, have occasionally been absent without leave or have refused to obey orders.

While that Dr. Evil-like plan was officially abandoned in 1991 because of budget cuts after the fall of the Berlin Wall, and former dolphin members of the Soviet Navy were reportedly finding new lines of work in 1997, there were reports in the wake of Hurricane Katrina that, as the Guardian suggested in 2005: “Armed dolphins, trained by the U.S. military to shoot terrorists and pinpoint spies underwater, may be missing in the Gulf of Mexico.” The Guardian report cited concerns that the dolphins may have been trained “to shoot at divers in wetsuits who have simulated terrorists in exercises,” and added, not so reassuringly, that “the U.S. navy admits it has been training dolphins for military purposes, but has refused to confirm that any are missing.”

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Ok, presumably that’s the Chinese ship, and in the foreground are the dolphins.

Who took the picture?

[R, Xinhua doesn’t say, but since the rest of their report is about the Chinese Navy escort of the merchant ships, it seems likely that the photographs were taken from a naval vessel. — RM, Lede Blog]

Sherif in New York April 15, 2009 · 4:16 pm

Dolphins 1, Pirates 0

Sports score or danger on the high seas? LOL

OK, is it dated April 1st?

Look around the base of the ship at the water. Doesn’t look quite right to me.

But who’s going to protect us when the dolphins realize there’s profit to be made in becoming pirates themselves?

I, for one, welcome our new cetaceous overlords.

anthony in Manhattan April 15, 2009 · 4:27 pm

there is a harness designed to attach to dolphins which has firearms designed for underwater use. The firearms are fully loaded and can be fired with a specialized trigger that the dolphin can set off, I cannot say how. It is really quite simple.

Were the dolphins singing “The East is Red?”

Carp do this kind of thing all the time and never get any recognition for it.
They’ve caught countless pirates, then released them.

Check it out: states with lots of carp have virtually no pirates.

wasn’t there an episode of the simpsons about maurauding dolphins

So, in appreciation of the dolphin help, let’s see the Chinese rally to convince the Japanese not to slaughter dolphins!

Perhaps Douglas Adams was onto something after all.
(See “So Long, and Thanks for All the Fish”)

Seems like a no-brainer: Aquaman.

And on the ships themselves, dogs with bees in their mouths. And when the dogs bark…

It doesn’t surprise me that dolphins, the second most intelligent creatures on Earth (mice are #1, humans #3), would do this.

So long, and thanks for all the fish!

We would all be better human beings if we spent a little time “lamenting our littleness” before the miracles of nature. I sure hope our government has not been using these animals in military training.

this story is 100% true

I’m skeptical of the photo. The 23rd dolphin from the right, in the middle of the pack, looks photoshopped in.

[H, It would be terrifying to discover that the dolphins have also mastered Photoshop. — RM, Lede Blog]

Is them American dolphins or Chinese dolphins? If them are American dolphins we need to send a bill to the Chinese navy! Is what I say!

I guess it does make more sense to attach frickin’ laser beams to dolphins rather than sharks. But are the dolphins ill-tempered? They have got to be ill-tempered.

Perhaps had dolphins been running Homeland Security, the SEC and the FED, both 911 and the financial crisis/worst recession since the Great Depression would not have occurred.

Dolphins and whales have prospered for hundreds of thousands of years until mankind figured out how to get out on the water. While dolphins have always understood that humans were different than both fish and baboons, they still cannot understand why humans act like baboons with the brains of fish.

These are some of the funniest comments I’ve read in a long time. Thanks for the laughs boys (and girls). :-O

More outsourcing!

If the dolphins did in fact thwart a pirate attack, there would be a tremendous amount of irony in that. I remember reading that originally the pirates that emerged off the coast of Somalia had noble aspirations and were merely protecting dolphins and preventing overfishing of the african coast.

Makes sense, considering the U.S. Navy SEALS have been involved recently. The Chinese navy probably figured that their own marine mammal division should get into the game.