Andy Murray in men's tennis kit: sadly, handsome Andy couldn't be bothered to come to the actual launch, thereby delaying, once again, our eventual elopement, but at least we can all admire his modelling skills. I think we can just skip the shorts as they are - to use professional fashion lingo - a bit 'meh', but the shirt is rather nifty with its red piping and all, and those red and black shoes are downright snazzy. I'm guessing Stella didn't spend too many hardworking hours over those socks though

Victoria Pendleton in women's cycling kit: now, in my professional fashion opinion, these jackets were the least aesthetically pleasing of the lot. I'm sure someone from Adidas will be happy to share how it's all very 'aerodynamic' and 'draws sweat away from the body' blah blah. But ultimately, it's tracksuit jacket with the Union flag on it and a strange obi belt. I like the red cuffs, mind

Phillips Idowu in men's triple jump kit: this very tall chap with multiple piercings is Philips Idowu, who is (sly glance at cheat sheet) a triple jumper. Now, this photo gives us all an opportunity to note, again, that only very tall and very fit men should attempt a one piece, even one cinched with a Star Wars-style girdle. Really guys, show your support of the Olympics, of course, but maybe stop at the lycra onesie. Idowu is also modelling the cheapest element of the Adidas kit - the £5 wristbands - and the most expensive - the £212 shoes. He mixes high end with high street, does Phillips

Jessica Ennis in women's track and field kit: aAhh, Jessica Ennis: the acceptably feminine face of British sport. What would newspaper picture editors do without you? Stick in a photo of Chris Hoy with his massive thighs? Give over. So here we have pretty Jessica and her six pack showing off a two-piece, which seems to have more branding than flag, as is the modern British way. Incidentally, the union flag cut in half? And partly on her hoo-hah? Is that even legal?

Jessica Ennis in women's track and field kit: oh, they've taken two photos of Jessica Ennis - WHAT A SURPRISE. But I'll forgive them because this outfit is quite snazzy, with its nipped-in waist on the T-shirt, contrast collar and really rather cool leggings - not a phrase I ever expected to write. Incidentally, I suspect those rather swish red shoes are the £212 trainers that Adidas are claiming are the 'lightest running shoes ever at 90g'. Although you know what they say: red shoes, no knickers. Just sayin'!

Chris Hoy in men's cycling kit: here is Chris Hoy wearing a very nice - OH MY LORD LOOK AT THE SIZE OF THAT MAN'S THIGHS THAT IS INSANE OH MY GOD! Sorry, sorry. I'll be professional now. Sorry. Anyway, this is the swish men's version of the swish women's cycling outfit, and very dashing it is, too. Even the biker shorts don't look too dreadful, something one rarely says about biker shorts. But even they can't describe the size of those thighs. Sorry. But come on! Look at them!

Jack Rodwell in men's football kit:again, we have what is the consistent style for all of Stella's designs for the Olympics team, one which I will officially dub 'chopped up blue flag, red contrast cuffs and collar'. Nipped-in waists with a belt-style effect - trompe l'oeil, one could even say here, if one wanted to drop the French bomb - is another common element, and never a bad one. 'Meh shorts' are quite a consistent feature, too, but it seemed mean to point that out initially.

Lizzie Armitstead in women's cycling kit: hmm, what does Lizzie Armitstead do, do you reckon? I bet she's a high jumper. Or maybe a synchronised swimmer. Or a water polo player. Whatever, she's wearing a pretty sleek little outfit here, with minimal flag detailing (always the safer option) and a nice red collar. The contrast colour shoulders are nigh-on fashionable and very flattering - a typical Stella touch. I could do without the 'Great Britain' wending its way all about her person but I get that might come in handy for when my sports desk colleagues are covering the event and they can't tell who represents which country. Sports journalists aren't as good as fashion journalists when it comes to spotting athletes, you know. Fact.

Drew Sullivan in men's basketball kit: oh, now this is rather nice, isn't it? Just the most subtle, even tasteful of references to the Union flag with nice little red detailing in the V-neck and on the shoulders. The blue is a lovely sky blue and even the shorts are pretty neat. Look at them swoosh about! Shame Team GB probably won't actually win the basketball gold medal, but at least we'll look good. And that's what really matters.