What helps you? Any tips for others?

Admin Joined : 14 Jan 2008 Posts : 133

Please reply here with any tips you have that may help others.

Joined : 13 Feb 2008 Posts : 74

I try to think about "what is the worst thing that can happen if I make a bad decision"? Most of the time, nothing. Or, at least not something that can't be dealt with.

For example, I used to take forever in a restaurant deciding what I wanted to eat. I would agonize over what to order. What if I order something and i don't like it? What about all the other choices on the menu? It just went on and on. Despite having worked as a waitress, I would still have them come back and ask them a million questions before I could make up my mind. I was nice about it, though! :)

So, when I was trying to change this behavior, I would give the menu a cursory look and purposefully order the first thing I saw -- ruling out any allergies of course! I ended up having a lot of interesting new food experiences -- some good, some not so good. But, it was always ok. I never went hungry. Nothing terrible happened to me. My life was not affected adversely because I didn't have the 'perfect meal'.

Now, when I go to out to eat, I figure out what I am in the mood for first -- such as pasta vs seafood vs chicken (for example). I do look the whole menu over, and may make a change depending on what I see. But, if I am still thinking..."I really felt like eating pasta tonight", I concentrate on that section and make a decision based on those choices. Once the decision is made -- that's it. I don't change it, or try to think about what kinds of foods I am missing. I don't hold up everyone else at the table or inconvenience the server.

Sometimes I still have these thoughts -- what if I made the wrong decision and panic inside? I remind myself it is only one meal, and push past it. From time to time I do regret what I have ordered, but I stick with it. And, usually, it ends up being ok.

Once I became better at making small decisions like this, I was able to make bigger decisions with more confidence. Even things like household improvements and such...now, I am the catalyst in the family for making these things happen, and usually end up making many of the decisions. I do some kind of research first, but I try not to overdo that.

For more important matters, I try not to make rash decisions. I try to weigh all the information and then decide.

My philosophy now is "just make a decision and get on with it"....and it almost always ends up being ok.