I know our world is constantly changing and I typically am buckled in for a bumpy ride but I am finding a current power struggle to be pretty difficult. I like to win, however, this is one that I need to lose for the greater good. That's a bitter pill for me to swallow.

My youngest son is graduating from high school, which is HUGE. We went through so many struggles with him that at one point my prayers consisted of " Please Lord don't let him be a serial killer" lol. This kid has struggled for every tidbit he has in life and ya know, I can see where it has truly been character building for him. I am happy to give him his wings.

My baby girl, she is a story all her own. It's really becoming such a fun ride! Every day there is a new letter or phone call. Yesterday we went home for lunch (she and I meet at home almost every day for lunch) and there was a letter from the University of Alabama Birmingham and on the voice mail was a call from Manhattan College in NY. Her volleyball and basketball teams BOTH qualified for Nationals and now when I google her name I actually see her listed on recruiters pages. I am happy to give her, her wings.

Now to the difficult part, my oldest. He is twenty. He has a good job, makes decent money, he has enrolled in school again and plans to go back to college part time this fall. Sounds pretty good when it's broken down like that. Problem. He is moving in with his girlfriend. It's not that I don't LIKE the girlfriend, she is just not someone that I can exactly warm up to. That's difficult because my family is very close.

He comes to me bouncing with excitement because they have just signed a lease on this apartment.. a very expensive apartment I might add. I wasn't trying to steal his thunder by any means but I had to ask why exactly they needed the extra bedroom and didn't they think it was a little over priced? She quickly snapped that they were "planning to entertain often and thought the extra bedroom would make a nice game room." Yes, my son is signing the lease. My son is planning on paying the rent. <sigh> I did talk to him and told him that I was afraid he might be over obligating himself and in turn will drop his college classes in order to work more hours. Heaven forbid she get pregnant and he then has to take care of a child. He can't remember to put the milk back in the fridge!

Sooooo I tell myself, why do we give our children wings if we are just going to clip them? I gave him his wings when he started college and now... I am really struggling with the thought of him falling out of the nest and not taking flight. I want to ground him and send him to his room but I am having to sit on the sidelines and watch his struggles. I keep telling myself, he has to figure out on his own just what kind of man he can be. But darned if its not creating an ulcer for me.

Fly away baby boy but the nest will be here if you fall.